Narcissistic Personality Disorder 2

Julia Papworth

1 week ago (edited)

Fantastic video.....This is so important. I nearly lost the will to live..... one Narc in relationship and another one at work? I have been sorely tested.

Allow your potential to shine...... yes they really do want to snub out the light. Just shine BRIGHTER 🌼🤩 No more abuse. Some people do not earn nor deserve my time, not when they are full of hate and want to drag me into darkness, where they dwell. NOPE! NO MORE! Shine brightly, care, love, be kind with cast-iron integrity and boundaries 🌸

Edgar Lindborg

1 week ago

My spouses favorite daily comments were that I was a thief, liar, and cheater- and she picked me up out of the gutter. She said I would be nothing if it was not for her. At which point I went to work and she went back to sleep for the day. I finally found Dr Ramani and am now trying to get my freedom

Clesita Moore

1 week ago

My narcissistic partner was also my boss… I’ve just kept my mouth shut for years, with all the gas lighting and embarrassment in front of everyone. Stealing ideas is a huge factor. I felt like a slave. He threw back things in my face like what he did for me and the thing is it wasn’t much at all. Imma bloom now I got out. I’m happy now, still shaken but happy☺️

DanielsVideos

1 week ago

I don’t even know what my hopes, dreams or even what I like anymore. I’m in my 40s now. Not long out of a 17 year relationship with a narc and had narcissistic parents. It’s embarrassing to admit but I won’t even buy a piece of clothing without taking a photo and sending it to my sister so she can tell me if it’s nice or not. I feel like the narcissistic relationship - which was extremely violent and abusive too - has robbed me of me and I’m just a shell. Everything that was me is gone. I don’t know how to get it back or get to know myself.

Narc Free

1 week ago

You are absolutely right Doctor Ramani. I went through this for 14 years. I'm only 36. I'm going through a divorce and he never encouraged, motivated or supported my dreams. He made what he thought I should be doing my aspirations and goals and when I didn't comply he them went on a smear campaign and made me out to be worthless, mediocre and that I wanted to live off of him. Now that we are divorcing he's now a superman father. He can do everything now. Cook, work, be here for the kids. Where was all of this when I was crying, begging and pleading for help? I hate that I allowed him to have so much control over my mind. It's sad really to think I was that gullible and meek.

Anahita Sadeghian

1 week ago

How I didn't know you before, Dr. Ramani? Thank you for the great talk (Loved your facial expressions and the power in your thoughts!).

I was two semesters away from defending my PhD; The abuser stole my business idea and now I am here 4 years later still wanting more, than anything, to wrap my degree. I am still trying to figure out a good momentum for times I am flat-tired. I promise myself and you, I will do it and will come and say thank you in person, soon.

Stay safe

Kaity B

1 week ago

Thank you for acknowledging the relief that comes with the death of a narcissist. My father still hasn't died, but it's the thing in the future that I am most excited about. It sucks when your truest truth is societally unacceptable.

Ivo Sanchez

2 days ago (edited)

narcissistic conditioning doesn't go away by merely recognizing one must have been brainwashed into thinking poorly about oneself, if it was that easy, it wouldn't be that big a course. would it? -- what is out there in terms of self-help to undo it? -- pretty much nothing, if one is lucky enough not to have a "learned" to cope by means a debilitating addiction, one gets up every day with the devils in one's head year after year. And what is one supposed to do? -- Moreover, one realizes this western world becomes day by day more full of full-blown narcs, narci, pseudo-narci people, narci values, narci leaders, what can be done to stop or at least improve that, aside of obviously voting Trump out November 2020?

Lynn Wallie

1 week ago

I, as an empath, wasted 44 yrs. of my life with a Malignant Covert Narcissist..... I allowed him to keep me from finishing my masters, getting a job as a college professor and a thousand other things.....

Hilary Kirsch

1 week ago

I needed this today. I’m 62 years old and I’m beginning to come into my own .

I’m still with the narc husband , but have supported his growth for 32 years. Fortunately, my self esteem has never wavered , I’m lucky that I’ve seen through him from day one.

But looking after his very need , and buffering and protecting my three daughters form his bullying and gaslighting took everything I had , including large chunks of my health. I drink too much, and I often think I’ve become the narcissist in the relationship. It’s really a defensive technique I’ve learnt as a shield. I think what I often do is simply getting him back, and slapping him with instant karma. It’s my best weapon so far. (Don’t think I haven’t ever slept with a kitchen knife under my mattress , because I have!)

I listened as he chastised me for not reaching my potential, berated me for being lazy, put me down for not contributing to the income..rather than encouraging me to do my own thing. All the time while I took care of three children born in four years, one with severe special needs, and one extremely challenging.

Two will be in therapy forever. But although I’ve been told that my two higher university degrees are rubbish, I now look forward every day to all the creative things I can do , and they’re beginning to bear fruit.

I’m a very proud survivor and even if I never break free, I’m succeeding in freeing myself from within, and winning so far.

I thank you for for your excellent input on this very specific topic . You have helped so much by expressing in clear , simple , easily understood language what narcissism is , and how its targets can heal.

trudijugger

1 week ago

Dr Ramani this video is wow!

I cut my dreams of marriage and children and to find love and peace.He made me work to enrich him and he took all the glory and the money.

The abuse was in every aspect possible and when I would rise up to him he would cry and get my sympathy.It was awful.After 2 years I knew I would kill him and end up in jail or die.So I ran away with the help of his friend.I had lost all my friends and the respect of my family leave alone the time and money I had lost..It took years to survive this.Mydreams were gone.

Jaclyn H

1 week ago

Love this video so much. It is so on point! I kindly ask to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE create a video on Conversational Narcissism... I am really struggling with this, and I can only imagine how many more other people are struggling with it and not recognizing this concept and how draining AF it is. <3 <3

Ginger Henna

1 week ago (edited)

So glad I got to hear this specific episode. Your sharing made me cry. You are a truth sayer, a real giant slayer! I went to various recovery meetings, each with different focus', they all helped and were a revelation, 33 years ago. But this video shoe, fits this Cinderella perfectly. 👡. It's just so true, the odd list of things you have to give up so that only the narcissist(s) can have it, ( like talent, intelligence, good looks, empathy, creativity, personality, humor, laughter, even family roles are demanded, be that in families or relationships even society at large.

Loved the," look, new bandwidth to work in is now available." Is this heaven? No, it's you tube and Dr. Ramani sharing her profound understands in spirit and in truth.

💟😊💫🕊🦅

Ines B.

1 week ago

My doctor said I will be in a wheel chair for the rest of my life, due to Ankylosing Spondylitis.

Nope! I divorced the narcissist after 8 years of marriage and being a stay at home Mom

The kids, 4,7 and 10 at the time.

My Ex didn’t give permission for the kids and I to move back to Germany, his own home country.

I decided to stay in the US and got a job at minimum wage.

No help from anyone as family is in Germany and highly narcissistic too.

Seven years later... I’m walking, solely provide for my children as Ex doesn’t pay child support, nor insurance.

I own a house, a car and my son and I became US citizens. ( only 2 kids were born in the US)

My Ex blocked my efforts and it took me 3 years to get the documents from 3 continents.

Additionally I had to get court orders to force him to cooperate.

We had 4 legal battles, he took one child away from me, ruined my name and finances.

I’m still here, strong and happy.

My daughter wants to live with me again.

The Ex ruined his successful career, no longer owns a house, a car and has debt up to his neck.

I was angry about the wasted years and giving up my career.

No longer am because being at home with my kids formed a solid foundation in our relationship from which we benefit today.

The kids are mature and kind human beings, Honor Students and the love of my life.

They see right through their Dad and are setting and upholding firm boundaries with him.

Boogertoez

1 week ago

I helped my “best friend” of 18 years with her engagement party only to be back stabbed in the end and accused of wanting her fiancé. Keep in mind, I would NEVER do something immoral like that nor have I ever done anything like that. So naturally, I was so confused as to why she would accuse me of wanting him. I realize now her insecurities got the best of her and how toxic she had become over the years. I would notice how she took jabs at me when I was helpful...”oh you only do that so you can look good.” I was criticized left and right by her. Her narcissistic projections were out of control killing me slowly. Glad I left that “friendship” 7 years ago along with her narcissistic entourage of gal pals that tried chasing me down when I left. Going no contact was the best decision ever! Now I am free and at peace with myself, but I do admit, I find it hard trusting myself again to make friends. When I see the red flags, I bail!

Saoussen Hammami

1 week ago

Both my parents are narcissistic and I'm still figuring this shit out. Guilt is REAL

Joy peterson

1 week ago

I am 8n tears it's been over 3 years and i cant seem to restart my life and my crushed dreams. Huh

Proud American Man

1 week ago

You’re Amazing Dr. Ramani ... Heaven sent and Divine ... Thank you 🙏🏻

jessica deshpande

1 week ago

Here's my little story...

I have a narcissistic father... So since childhood... It was always him and his dreams.... That he pushed on to me... My brother was like the shadow child... Mother was alcoholic... And he a former drug addict...

I always loved dramatics... But since he felt that I wasn't interested in my sports career.. He actually kicked me as a 9yr old...

Fast forward. I started going into depression... At the age of 14..my father took me to a shrink.. Who used to overdose me... He started having an affair and used to take me to the woman's house...

Later my mom went ballistic on finding out... And he conviniently blamed me for trying to seperate them..

He joined the same organisation for Sprituality as mine and soon turned everyone against me...

He turned my mom's family and friends also against her...

Unfortunately, I was later in a narcissistic relationship with a guy for 12 years... He and his mother were exactly like my dad...

The abuse continued.

My grades were plummeting..

And I couldn't wait to get out of my house..

I finally got a breakthrough when I could got a govt scholorship and I have now met a nice guy and will be getting married soon..

I have learnt to be self reliant and always trust my gut...

I don't speak much to my father.

Coming from the Indian culture.. Parents r treated as gods.

But I have learnt how to distance myself and not fall into societal pressures.

Best of luck to all héros and survivors of narcissistic abuse

Tracy D'Anneo

1 week ago

I’d have to leave a really long comment to tally the number of experiences I’ve had in which a narc ruined possibilities, projects or whatever you want to call it when we lose our potential. If you’re a creative person working in film or publishing there’s no way you haven’t been blindsided by a narc at some point. Harvey Weinstein was my boss! That said, if you’ve never read “The Artist”s Way” by Julia Cameron then check it out. Her chapters on “crazymakers” and “creative U-turns” can give some helpful perspective. Thank you for this amazing video! I agree, this is a subject that really makes me angry.

Sandi Stoliar

6 days ago

Thank you for this video and your enlightening work. My experiences feel validated by your words. It was like you used my journal entries to prepare this post. Thank you!

ewum

1 week ago (edited)

I lost my dream about having a big family because of my narc’s future faking.

Vishwas Narayan

1 week ago

Thank you so much Dr.Ramani for this insight! It really helped me to identify and understand why narcissistic people do such horrific things.

Matteo Melloni

4 days ago

I gave up to my great passion for computer science. It was the thing that came easily to me as anything else (on the professional side). 2 years have passed, I hope to have it back

Phyllis June Miller Johnson

1 week ago

Oh yeah. "just give them a chance" "he seems like such a nice guy" Yeah I'm angry too and it's going to motivate me from here on in.

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Werner Lemberg

1 week ago

My heart breaks for all of you. To think I was only in a narcissistic relationship fraught with abuse for 17 months, and I still feel like I’m ruined for life. I can’t imagine five years, ten years, twenty... I don’t know if I’ll ever be fully healed from the trauma, but I’m going to try. Maybe I’ll never reach my full potential now, but I can still be happy.

Jyoti

6 days ago

This was such a helpful video for me. I was brought up in. an abusive family, I was constantly criticised & lectured by my father & told how I would never amount to anything & that my generation are nothing but degenerates. Married a man who was possibly on the autistic spectrum, with machiavellian, obsessive behaviours & with who I always felt inferior, he was very driven & high achieving. We were not well matched emotionally, I felt there was no real connection with him. It was a very bruising experience to be distanced, ignored, passive aggressively abused & eventually discarded by him. Leaving me with M.E/CFS following a viral illness & two small children. A while later I got together with a more recognisably grandiose, narcissistic partner, although I didn't have the emotional literacy to realise it at the time. Again another work obsessed man, whose main priority was growing his business to be up there with the big boys. I felt I was being put into competition with him & that I was less of a person than him for not having an income of my own. I trained in counselling & then later in Integrated Energy Therapy a therapeutic touch technique, for trauma & emotional healing. My partner supported me financially to do the latter training. He also supported me in finding a place to create a retreat centre in the wilds of Portugal, where I hoped to be able to welcome small groups, to take nature immersive & therapeutic retreats. We had not been getting along very well, for some time, he had kept me down, been unable to commit, had punished me for his former wife's betrayal of him & had used finance to control many aspects of my life. As I grew & developed, in my deep desire & soul urge to start a nature based project, that was my own & to become independent, my partner became more threatened. I think this was when he started cheating on me. He had never been emotionally faithful to me, often putting the desires of his fiends & colleagues ahead of the relationship, another area where I was unwillingly plunged into competition, for his very limited time & attention. Looking back on it, I can see that he supported my endeavours so that he could get me out of his life. Just before we were due to complete on buying the isolated farm house, he told me he didn't love me anymore & that he couldn't go on in the relationship but insisted that I should go ahead with the project. I was shocked & broken, I was by then deeply trauma bonded with him & was in the cycle of hoping & wishing that he would ''get it" & start showing some care", trap. I asked if there was anyone else & he denied it & urged me to go ahead with my plan. I was left in a country, where I knew hardly a soul, with a very small amount of language & with a small amount of money, with which to start a business & renovate the rather dilapidated farmhouse, which had a leaking roof, one tiny solar panel & which flooded in the winter. A place I would never have dreamed of taking on alone. It wasn't until a couple of months later, that I receive a very hurtful message from his new girl friend. I was devastated, shocked at her aggression & traumatised again, she started calling the house & emailing quite threatening messages. I was expected to make a success & be up & running & supporting myself overnight. It didn't work out, although I did manage to hold a couple of retreats in 2014 ( it was difficult for the clients with a very limited electricity supply) but I stayed in place sold some possessions & did what I could with the house. The circumstances conspired to provide me with my own, deep, healing retreat & the solitude & profound beauty of the place healed me greatly. In short I realised the retreat was for me, there were too many logistic & financial obstacles for me ever to have made a success of my project. 4 years later we reconnected, the new partner had given him a taste of his own medicine and she was as narcissistic as he was. It's a long story but we drifted back together, he was so appreciative of what I had achieved, without him & full of what seemed like sincere regret about what he described as the biggest mistake of his life. We were almost happy for about 18 months but he got bored with happiness & he was also starting to get physically ill & in another vain attempt to regain his lost youth & by then in his seventies, he started cheating on me again. He said he thought I had changed but it turned out that I hadn't & he was bitterly disappointed in me. I told him I have changed because I no longer accept poor treatment, lies or cheating, & that if that is how he feels then we are truly over, which I suspect came as a blow & a shock to him. We fell apart again & his parting shot was " You never did what you said you were going to do with that place, it was all a scam" He got very sick & we were estranged towards the end of his life. I was with him for almost of 25 years, I did all I could to care for him, he made so many things possible for me, ( except a healthy loving relationship) but made absolutely certain that I wouldn't succeed. I loved him long & true but it's a relief that he is no longer in my life & I will be able to reclaim something at the end of the day, to move forward with my life in my own later years. I'm no longer ambitious, I just want to settle, stay as well as I can, put down some real roots again in my beloved Wales, spend time with my adult children, their partners & my year old granddaughter. tend a garden, get creative again, marry a ginger tom cat & revel in knowing that I'm finally beyond his reach. The healing that took place in my hermit years in the natural park & the simplicity of my current aims & values, are my success & I keep my eyes on the prize as I plan to make a new home. I had blamed myself for being inadequate, less than, an under achiever etc. I was told as much all my life. Thank you for posting this video, I have been meaning to comment, since I watched it a few days ago. It has supported me greatly. I appreciate your videos & the thought that goes into them. Blessings be on you Dr Ramani

Mitzi Ocean

5 hours ago

After years of a narcissistic father and brothers, I gave up my hope to study biology, to work full time to pay for my narcissistic brother, that refused to go to public high school, like the rest of us.

After my Angel Mom finally left my abusive father and brought us to live in Israel, where the only 2 relatives of hers to survive the Holocaust lived.

(yeah, you guessed it, that brother had been our narcissistic father's Flying

Monkey, and before leaving, my brother reaped many rewards and got all he wanted, from our otherwise paranoid tightfisted father)

My egocentric brother got my mom into

trouble, because he refused to go to the public high school. He demanded to go to the 'International American School' (All diplomats and the very rich, though we were so poor, we couldn't afford a refrigerator for a year and a TV, for 10 years)

After that met my abusive ex, that admitted to getting a very naive me pregnant on purpose to force to marry him. That relationship all but killed me.

After finally getting my divorce, I trained to work in a nursery school, later opened my own daycare, because I felt that each place I worked hadn't been giving each individual child enough unconditional love and attention. I loved them and learned from the beautiful children, made up stories to tell them that they loved more than their favorite books, did all the craft work and planted together our organic garden, did yoga, gave them organic vegetarian food and let them help grow and prepare it togetherwith me and all the time singing our song about what we are doingat that moment. We learned about other religions and people and to love them because they are like us too.

The daycare became very popular and I had it about 20 years, till my health gave out. Then began to teach more ESL and volunteer to become a global Animal Rights Activist. Becoming the global coordinator of the International Anti Fur Coalition, (IAFC) and my own fb groups for 'Cruelty Free Medicine' 'Action to Change Terminology for Animals' etc.

I love you Dr. Ramani and giving you a huge Thank u Hug 💖💖🤗🤗

S D

5 days ago

Doc Ramani, my parents and entire bullying childhood environment caused me to have avoidant personality disorder.... It's that bad..

Ashlea

1 week ago (edited)

10:42 - She got me right in the feels.

You seriously can do anything when you realise the strength you have at the other side of this. Don't ever give in to these evil forces!

Michelle Packman

1 week ago (edited)

Thank you so much for sharing this, and apologies for such a long message, I want to share because I feel like I can share something that might be helpful in the sense that success after narcissistic abuse doesn't look how people want it to, it doesn't necessarily match what you may have wanted before. I know it's a lot, but please read to the end, because I really want to express my gratitude to you in context. If you can't read the whole thing, at least the final paragraph. I hope this uplifts all of us who are struggling through this. It's been a while since I was in that relationship so I haven't watched too many videos lately, but I'm glad I clicked on this one because even though I've healed a lot, I really really struggle with post-abuse imposter syndrome in my work. You know, it's interesting, I never really realized it until I watched this video... My narc didn't actually ever really devalue my professional accomplishments, he actually vocally supported them, at least while he was trying to love-bomb me. But he would whittle away at my soul, and my character, like telling me people thought my shyness was rude (I have social anxiety) and then telling them that I didn't care about them, or would do even more insidious things; Calling me unreliable and messy when I did make human mistakes, really digging into my insecurities with people. Covert sexual boundary crossing that he would convince me were my fault. Things that I couldn't possibly call out, like professing to help me with work and doing all of the work for me. Over time, I became dependent on him with my work, and it took unimaginable energy for me to do anything on my own. And when I look back on the time spent with him, I was doing a TON of stuff pro-bono, things that he would convince me had pay, or that would help my career. I'm finally realizing it that he was able to clip my wings without ever even shit talking my work, but destroying even deeper parts of me. It was 100% covert. I knew deep down that something was really off because I felt powerless.

Perhaps out of some deeply buried need for self-preservation, I enrolled in a program at a really well-known school in my field that was across the country, a school I would have never thought I deserved before meeting him. Paradoxically, in the initial love-bombing phase, I actually absorbed so many of his behaviors; for the first time in my life, I struggled with entitlement, feeling unsatisfied with being ordinary, not wanting to wait my turn in public spaces, etc, but it also gave me a lot of strength to overcome a lot of my anxieties, like feeling like I deserved to be at a good college. If I hadn't been across the country, I wouldn't have had the chance to feel independent again and ultimately leave. Of course, when I figured out what was happening and I left him, he went on a rampant smear campaign. So many of my colleagues now believe I'm bad with money, untrustworthy, too depressed to be grounded, etc. The people who know me well all openly supported me, but the people who didn't know me... I've been vibed so much at work...

I'm absolutely terrified of success now, I'm so sure that if I cultivate any success, that he will come out of the woodwork and go even more public with the smearing. Since leaving him, I've actually had some gigs that look really good on paper, and my business is booming. I have so much grit to drag myself through the motions, but it's been agonizing to constantly face the imposter syndrome that has infiltrated every aspect of my life. when I achieve greatly, I can't enjoy it, and I have so much anxiety that I'll mess it up and affirm his smearing. I often do way more work than I should so people working with me can't see any flaws. I stay up until 3 or 4 in the morning every night working my ass off to be good enough and then some. I feel narcissistic and wrong being open about my accomplishments, but I got the chance to perform with Eminem, 5 Seconds of Summer, and some other really wonderful musical acts, but the whole time I'm there, I'm bound by terrifying perfectionism. I'm also afraid to share these things because I'm bound by the fear that talking about them looks like narcissistic name-dropping. So thank you so much for giving me the space to talk about my accomplishments, I never do unless people ask.

I should feel lucky to have what I have, and I try my best to practice stillness and gratitude, but I still struggle. There wasn't a moment in the abuse where I believed I didn't deserve to be treated well and that I don't deserve good things, so I have no idea why they're so debilitating now. the social anxiety I'd worked on so hard before that relationship started is worse, it's like Ive never done the work or something. I still don't understand this. The smear campaign, just as much as the in-person, line-of-sight abuse, really took the wind out of my sails and I am fighting so, so hard to move forward. I've recovered in so many ways, but I struggle to believe I deserve the good things that come to me, and that those good things won't result in something catastrophic for me.

I know this is super long but I have one more point, and this is the good part: I can now unequivocally say that the things that bring me true joy in my work as a musician aren't the acts with widespread cultural legitimacy, that feel like a whirlwind, that inflate your spirit for a week or so, but it is in fact the long-term personal relationships you cultivate with your neighborhood studio engineer and his old dog who hangs around while I record, or the guy who never went to music school but studied law and came to music at 50 and his music is so heartfelt and honest that I'm proud to work on it anyway, or the little girl who emails asking me for a lesson because she likes a song I wrote. Holy crap, can I feel the depth of those connections like I'm a human magnifying glass. the depth of those connections and the power of light that emerges from your soul after you go through abuse is that of someone who has been forged into diamond by the hottest kiln. I don't think it will ever be fair to myself to say that I'm thankful for the abuse, but I will absolutely own the power of light I now hold within. I have the power to heal, and I honestly feel like I have a duty to make up for the damage I know they're spreading in the world. I know this sounds funny, but I actually think of myself as Gandalf sometimes to give myself a good laugh..... I had a good heart before when I was gandalf the grey, but I was reborn, and I've come back with a fire, this duty to make the world burn bright with a light to drive away the darkness, and I have the power to do that and this fire in my belly to make it so. I'm lucky that I work in an industry that gives me a voice to connect with so many people. I think once I figure out how to channel this power in the right way, I can make a real difference, I just have to be brave enough to be vulnerable, and that's the real catch 22. Being vulnerable after all of that. And for whatever it's worth, Dr Ramani, I think you've figured out your own version of this and you really are helping the world, jamming your gandalf staff into the ground and throwing light out in all directions saying YOU SHALL NOT PASS. anyway, thanks for all you do, and I want you to know, sister, I can feel the light.

Fran Fran

1 week ago

Thank you for this video.

Thank you Frankie for clicking on it and watching it 😁💪

SUPER POWER!!!!!! WOW!!!!! YES I HAVE!!!! 💪

My brother was very abusive towards me... possibly a narcissist...

I had lots of abusive men use me.

My sons father was abusive. Made me believe because of past men no one would want me and I was disgusting.

I don't know if he was a narcissist though because he wasn't subtle...

I managed to get out as he said in the beginning if any one cheats it's over.

He said he would never cheat but if I did; him and his sisters would beat me and his nan would hate me.

He cheated on me. It still wasn't easy but I had that from his own mouth.

I had a few flings, not understanding relationships and getting used some more.

I did my first ever extra job and also an extra was an award winning film director.

He was a narcissist.

After I met him I was excited and started writing my film script.

I trusted him with the treatment (outline) Anyway it was a mistake.

While writing it I decided I would go celibate and wait until marriage.

I didn't want to view the narc film director like that. I wanted to write my film.

I struggled with it. I ended up meeting him and my boundaries were not firm.

I was confused.

Because I said to God '"the next man will be the one" I felt I had to keep him.

After a few months of being used I paid lots of money for different relationship and psychology programs to try and use them on him. He lied to me future faking etc.

I was not aware how sucked in I was but after I got rid of him I learnt about Narcissists.

I realised that is what he was.

When I realised this I was led woah!! I started piecing together puzzles of the whole 2 years and the psychology I learnt to use lovingly with a man I love... he had been using on me... horrifyingly even the sex stuff, but it didn't manage to work because I saw through it.

I managed to get rid of him because I stopped complying with him. He got me to spend loads of money on him too. Disgusting!!

The last straw was I I messaged ALL the women on his Facebook a video of him sleeping. He never let me take photos of him yet he took photos of me. I think he even drugged me, and filmed me doing things. If that is true.... when I become a famous actress it will all cone out...

After I got rid of him... I got lead acting roles in student films and even small parts on the TV.

I still struggle because I hardly ever look for jobs but I am getting so much better.

I came across another narcissist. He got my heart but he couldn't control my mind. I had to feel so much. I put myself in danger.

He nearly killed me but his friend liked me and stopped him. Fucking crazy. I still obsessed over him either though I knew.

I managed to eventually stop it enough to stop chasing him.

Burried the rest.

I then cane across ANOTHER one. Hilarious and amazing. His title is spiritual psychologist. I thought he could help me. I thought I was safe.

He did help me. I released the last of darkness left in me. He couldn't handle the truth he preaches to others in groups that give him money. It was hilarious.

When he blocked me and removed me from his group I was ecstatic and overjoyed in love and complete freedom.

Onwards and upwards. It's a slow process.

I was often bullied for being fat. Before the film director I got it under control.

While writing my script I gained a bit.

When I met the film director one of his lies was "lose weight and I will buy you a Versace dress and take you to a film premier." I did lose lots of weight and he told me to lose more. I ended up gaining weight.

My weight has been up and down ever since and I haven't been able to keep it at the place I want it.

I have a fresh new mind set. I am happy and free. Everyday do something towards m dream. Thank you Dr Ramani 💖

Before I was pregnant Dad got me a ticket to UPW with Tony Robbins. My sons father didn't want me to go and I listened to him...

I regretted it but tried not to dwell on it.

Dad died last year and I got myself a ticket. Meant to be in May but now October if it stays 🤞🤞 Anyway I am so determined to use my super power for good. Thank you so much Dr Ramani 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 I am petrified of attracting any more.

I need to let love in from the ones I think "not sure about this" even though I know they're beautiful and wouldn't hurt me 😊

I recently wondered if my mum is a narcissist. Makes sense about my brother being one.

I really think that she could be one. Completely eye opening as I always believed it was me.... but then that is what they make you think.

Absolutely fascinating!! I guess I need to think that my mum is actually a narcissist. My older said she felt maternal towards me and my little sister. My older said the my mum is nice to everyone else but not her family. My mum looks good and all my friends always told me my mum is lovely and very nice. I loved it but I personally felt strange...🤔

Makes sense if my mum is a narcissist. I don't have many memories of my mum. I have a few of when she slapped me. One with a nose bleed.

Being left alone in the car for ages when she went shopping. I have noticed her recently with smarmy comments too. I realise I have always blocked her out. Very strange. Am I supposed to hate her to move on?

She put me in an adolescent unit age 15. She kicked me out age 17. She kicked my little sister out age 16/17. And when my older sister went to Uni she didn't feel very welcome in the holidays.

Is my mum a narcissist?

My dads friend said my dad always got with controlling money grabbing women. My step dad does so much for her and she always complains. He isn't very well yet she flies around the world with her job leaving him on his own. She isn't very nice to my step dad and my step dad has always been so so so soooo lovely 😊💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Nance McNance

1 week ago

So glad I found you DR Ramani, I can now see it for what it is and how its circuitous nature will never change

It'sBree

1 week ago

This is such a powerful permission-giving video./content. I am so grateful to Dr. Ramani. What a powerhouse of empathy and knowledge. The world needs more voices like her's.

V Oliver Rutherfurd

1 week ago

I fell in love with a woman who expected me to make her the center of my universe. I had to end friendships for her, pay for anything she wanted, sacrificed my physical and mental health and financially supported her goal of becoming Instagram famous. And then, when she was done with me, she cut me off with absolutely no remorse. A narcissist doesn’t see you as a person, you’re their play thing until they get bored.

Thank you, I really needed to hear that ❤

Britt Magadini

1 week ago

this so speaks to my soul! It is so kismet that this video popped up on my feed tonight...first of your videos i have seen! I obsess about the 'what ifs' all the time...and ironically...i am a reader/healer and always help others find their true mission...yet i feel so disappointed in my own life. Your encouragement really helps. Thank you so much for sharing your compassion and wisdom!

Mylene Brunelle

1 week ago

I’ve been with a narcissist for 10 years and I did all those things....until now. I’m fighting back and he’s not liking it one bit. He can leave anytime, I don’t mind one little bit!

Vasanti Punchoo

1 week ago

And still i keep in a trap between a daughter and a father both of the same temperament .destroying around them but saying that they r victims

Cyanidepixie

1 week ago

When you said distancing yourself from the narcissist was like dropping 300lbs, I literally squealed with delight lol! That is exactly how it felt when I ended it. It was an instantaneous feeling of lightness. It was an impulsive, anger made decision with no clear idea how to move forward, but for the first time in over 25 years, I felt truly happy and truly free. I found your channel after the fact and you've helped immensely. Thank you!

DoctorRamani

sharon stone

1 week ago

It's like you were taking directly to me, I love you ❤️❤️❤️

Rebecca W.

1 week ago (edited)

Thank you for sharing the best part first, Dr. Ramani. I cry as I think how to tell my experience. My Mother was my first life obstacle. Didn't understand her being the narc she is until my third, long-term relationship nearly destroyed my life.

Finally one day a serious panic attack sent me home from work and straight to a counselor. I was so thin and stressed out at that point. My nervous system was giving out on me. Gratefully the "unconventional" counselor that I happened to choose identified the problem right away, and I realized I had to leave, though I knew it wouldn't be easy.

After I started to see things clearly..and the pattern that was happening.. I one day, out of anger, confronted my mother telling her how all my life people had been trying to steal my "light". That was the day I knew I would never give her the opportunity to EVER belittle me again only for her pathetic benefit. And she knew then that I was onto something.

She has no clue of the struggles I've managed nor the successes I've accomplished. If/when I used to try sharing ANYTHING she would ALWAYS steer the conversation directly to something about her greatness and how it compares. It's always a comparison to her, never a conversation.

Anyhow, I wound up in a very manipulative relationship. It took 2 years to understand what was happening and 2 more years to escape. Long story short, I lost everything. My sanity, my health, apartment, my job, long-time friends..and my dreams.. that he used as leverage for control against me. He promised me the world, including part ownership of the business I was working overtime to help him create.

But after all my exhausting efforts, it was never enough, and he made the environment (business vs relation) so unbearable and unfair ("love triangle" b.s. at this point) that I had no choice but to leave. It was the hardest experience of my life. I felt I'd given away my dreams and my power to someone who threw them in the blender for me to later try and make sense of.

Yes, it's been a difficult 3 yrs since the great escape, and two more failed, (luckily) short attempts at relationships (also narcissists).

But now I hear my intuition so loudly. My gut speaks to me and makes me very sick when something is not right.

I pray everyday for help and support to be healthy and strong enough to continue on. Because some days it all feels way too difficult.

I had to understand what I've been running from all my life. It all revolves around narcissistic abuse.

And now those days are done. If I remain single for life, so be it. There is a whole lot of peace in the possibility at this point.

Much gratitude and respect for your work Dr. R. Thank you for being here.

Mari G

1 week ago

Last semester of my PhD course work. My GPA dropped with the easiest class and I never did my dissertation

Sunny Blue

1 week ago

I was stuck with a narcissist for 3 years. All the way through high-school. And it was one of my first "proper relationships" so I didn't know any better. I lost so many friends and opportunities because of the person I had to become to survive this abuse. I'm still learning but I now have a partner who loves me and supports me unconditionally. I've since made so many new friends and went back to dancing and educating myself. And it's the best thing that has happened to me, thank you dr. Ramani for opening my eyes and consistently shining a light on narcissistic abuse and making me and others understand properly what it means and why it was happening.

Jenny Tai

1 week ago

I'd say, if you were ever thinking of starting a business. Emotional independence is also worth cultivating after getting a lesson from being dragged down by the narc in your life. If u were starting a business and hoping someone around u would support you, consider if your government has funding in the sector, your own skills, your emotional capacity, government funded help, and the market. Afterall in some countries 85% of small businesses fail in their first year. So it gives enough reasons for family members to worry even if they are not narccissitic.

jtag9807

1 week ago

Omg I felt this so deeply. I literally cried!

Grimm 333

1 week ago

My mother always expected me to know and do everything perfect but never taught me anything. I wanted to go to college she wouldn't help me so I found a way to do it myself. For 3 years I tried hard every day she told me how I couldn't do it to just get a factory job. So I did I quit college. Now I'm jobless after 20 years of college. Now she tells me how I could have been someone if I would have only finished college. I have so just giving up on life and I let her do it. I feel like such a loser

MOST The Games

1 week ago

I was upgrading to get into a nursing program when I was 23. I was living at my dad's at the time. He told me that I wasn't smart enough to do a degree in nursing, so I should move out into an apartment, and see about getting more hours at Boston pizza. Wtf!! Ofcourse, at the time I just froze. I nodded in agreement!! Now I'm 45 I have finally cut that horrible man out of my life. My father did so many things to me that caused me to hate and doubt myself. I hate him.

Mystery Zen

1 week ago

I gave up so much. I've only just realised how much I gave up, how much of me was eaten away. It's a slow process, but I am committed to getting myself back.

Terel Denton

1 week ago

Delicious knowledge! Thank you for your wisdom! I'll make sure to incoperate this knowledge to my life. Subbed!

Bill Perkins

6 days ago

Doc you have helped me so much with your knowledge and insight I have been following you for about 6 months now you amaze me with the fact that you have such an understanding no others out there have an understanding of personality disorders like you do you are very good at articulating and giving a lesson that is actually useful and practical I have broken away from my narcissist I have been in the career that I am in for forty years now I am studying for a better job my name is William William equals conquering the hurdles that are put before me I have taken my life back and I am pursuing a dream of mine if it if it had not been for you I probably would still be with that that person I just don't know whether they were a covert narcissist or a malignant narcissist or had antisocial personality disorder could you please do a comparison on the three I have been trying to watch all of your videos to try and figure out which one they are not that it really matters I'm just curious for my own personal closure when you beat something kind of want to know what you beat besides I have found out that I am a very empathetic person I would give anybody anything that I have so that they could better further their self the problem is most people like thatare just trying to take advantage for their own personal selfishness and they are not going to reveal that to you that's just a stumbling block that you have to figure out for yourself unfortunately if people would just be honest up front life would be so much better again thank you so much for this channel that you madebecause there is none other in the world like it and even though they are out of my life I still watch you and any new video you got because I like to be educated I will always love to learn and I need every arsenal in my back pocketto try and avoid this situation if there is a next time sew-in feedback keep on doing this don't ever quit please you have such an excellent knack for this you're the best

Ahollywoodjoe video diary series

11 hours ago

Powerful, this is giving me courage to not be afraid to stand my ground speak truth. I wish that I could leave this relationship business but it is tied into real estate the roof over my head but I do know that if I do continue to fight for my rights others may realize they also have those same rights.

Mary Burgess

1 week ago

thank you Dr. Ramani. I am in the process of leaving yet another relationship with a covert narcissist (sad to say it's not my first), but God is giving me A LOT of strength and a vision for tomorrow... planning on moving back to my home state of ND to build a refuge for people who need a place of restoration, where I hope to be able to live, as well... a rescue farm with therapy horses and dogs, a place to heal, but also a place to learn life skills... this is just a beginning, planning stage, so it's gonna take a lot of prayer and a LOT of work... but I'm trusting God for EVERY step because as I fight for my own soul, I am able to fight for the soul of others, as well... and that is my greatest joy, because it's in my DNA to be an advocate for God's people, who just happens to be gifted in music... so there are many levels to this dream that I've had for several years, but I believe many things are coming into place now so that it will finally come to fruition. THANK YOU VERY MUCH for your encouragement. It means so much.

A R

1 week ago

I have no dreams any more. I’m just marking time before I die.

karen rudge

1 week ago

Thankyou for this beautiful sharing, it made me cry also! ❤

Beena Rani

21 hours ago

I'm a survivor,I broke free at fifty and I'm soaring,now,I was moved to see you emotional, I know!

Kat Eisenbeis

1 week ago

My life has changed since I have learned the tactics of a Narcissist. After 39 years in an marriage I’m ready to live my own life in freedom and I’m not afraid. Thanks Dr. Ramani

Katya Benoit

1 week ago

Thank you so much for explaining what a narcissist is and how impersonal it is. Makes me realize to only be more compassionate for me.

Janice B

1 week ago

I excitedly enrolled in a MSc at a modest university, two years in the Prof said I didn't do any of the work despite bound, dated, hand written lab books, I then discovered he had done this to 8 graduate students before me. It was a game for him, a 'I have tenure' game. I wrote and defended my thesis on my own - I was the first student he graduated (the others quit after years of wasted time) - he never spoke to me again.

Kassi Lee

18 hours ago

Hi, Amazing advice, Thank you so much for making this video.

Vadim Hoekstra

1 week ago

One terrifying aspect is the level of fine tuning by the narc.

Dr. Ramani is spot on with this subject of lost years.

But, never lose hope.

PATH 22

1 week ago (edited)

This was excellent! I feel you, Doc... Unfortunately there is a capacity issue to comments, I wouldn't be able to say much, before running out of space! I should write a letter! Thanks, sis... for everything!

That 70's Reader

4 days ago

My parents never supported my education choices. I had to disappoint them, drop out of a program I never wanted to be in, reapply to university and get funding on my own. Best decision I made, but such a disappointment that the support and encouragement was not there.

AnnemetteSloterbro

1 week ago

I gave up literally everything I actually loved, enjoyed and liked in my life. From having a coffee at the terrasse in the sun (of course he would criticise that) to projects, academic/cursus/everything I would want to learn actually, job opportunities, finishing a biodynamics agriculture cursus (he insisted I didn't need that, that I was better off working for him full time... Horse sh***, he owes me 3 months salary and this is only the ones of this year), my driving licence, drawing and aquarelle painting which he hated me doing, seeing friends, going to events, conferences, workshops, talking to people, even talking with his father was too offensive, knitting (was losing my time knitting, of course...) he even told me I spent too much time on the phone with my mother and sister who live really far from me. I also loved taking time with the kids, enjoyed planning their week and organise activities, but would he witness that enjoyment, he d then keep telling me I wasn't a good mother, especially the days I would spend time with them, which is contradictory,... he would argue on the house being (a little bit but he'd make it a mountain while he wouldn't of course participate on any chores, not even picking up his own socks below the couch) messy, dinner was "disgusting"...

Everything he could find to undermine me, he would argue and sort of try to print it on my head, and I thought for a long time that this was only him repeating what he had lived before, but I understood the consequence and fact was he was just destroying me whenever he felt I was successful or happy doing something I was good at or enjoyed.

He also had no problem on arguing in front of the children which I think is a sign of immaturity and disrrispect for both them and me... besides him being 12years older than me.

I left 3 weeks ago, and have been listening to your videos since Septembre, October. You have put words on what was happening in this relationship, and that was one of the best things that happened to me the last 8years.

I could of course have left sooner, because there were physical violence, but I had "no idea" that his behavior and mindset would never change and that he was future faking me, gaslhighting me,triangulating, and whatnot.

Now as I became more familiar with these concepts, they actually suddenly started to exist in my intellect. Before that, they were some sort of cloudy cold fogg from which I had no intention to get closer to.

You helped me getting closer to those foggy areas and see what was behind it.

Thank you so much for your work and this amazing glossary you are sharing with the world. You have been sort of accompanying me through these times, by educating me about these matters and I couldn't wish a better structure or clearer way to explain all those things I needed to grasp in order to acknowledge the various abuses happening on this relationship, and finally do what is right for me, even if it is not for him.

Each time I had to cook, clean, garden, or work (for him) completely alone with him never having a real conversation with me, and leaving me do to all the household alone, I would put on your videos. In those moments I was less alone, I was learning (which I love), and I was sometimes laughing, and I certainly was growing and knowing more about myself too.

If there is a god, I am sure he must be proud of you and the altruistic, supportive and inspiring mission you are accomplishing. 🙃🙏♥

avenginggoddess

1 week ago

I was raised by an abusive covert narcissist. More recently, I have dealt with several narcs in the workplace; these people were bullies and undermined my confidence. I'm still dealing with the feelings of incompetence they intentionally instilled in me.I'm working hard to remove their toxic, negative voices from my head. I'm currently job searching, and I will not play a narc's cruel games any longer. I essentially told my last narc (my boss) to jump off a cliff, packed my bags, and moved 1000 miles away to a much better life.

B T

1 week ago

Just friendly constructive criticism—this felt like you were talking to people who have gone through this as damaged goods. Really made me feel bad

7 beatslikecrack

1 week ago

Every word you said in this video is so true🎯🎯 I've been experiencing this behavior for a very long time with my x. It's only been two weeks since I left and I must say that you are helping me recover💖💖💖 It was very hard for me to leave her behind, because we grew up together and I knew what she were going through as child. I thought I would be able to cover her with love and show her that good people still exist...long story short. But I ended up getting hurt repeatedly in the process. I've tried and tried to bring her to reality and get her closer to God, but she kept pulling away. I've questioned myself about me loving her so much, but in return I received nothing but hate...

Jesse Busdegan

1 week ago

Can you do a segment on Leaving a narcissist with children /visitation or even court battle with narcissist, going throiugh this right now and im going in blind, you have been a light in the darkness so far, thank you for helping me

Nicole Livi

6 days ago

I end up quitting my job I felt so low. I couldn't keep money. Evicted from my apartment. My self esteem being to diminish slow every day. I felt worthless and I couldn't take it no more I thought I was going crazy .

TheSevimuzun

1 week ago

Wow! Thank you so much Dr. Ramani! Your work has helped me so much! To understand the "mechanism", how narcism works. I was almost done with the narcissists in my life (my mother, my beloved aunt, my "best" friend, and a man, i was "in love" with, but never in a real realitionship). I came to a point, where i was so drained, so sad, felt so "being robbed", that i finally knew: i had to make a choice: me or them. And the answer was: Me! Finally! It did not happen all together. But one by one, i ´ve gone (almost) no contact. The relief, i felt, was incredible. No loss at all! But all gain. Then you crossed my way! And now: there were words, for all my feelings, for all i went through, but couldnt talk about, because i didnt had the vocabulary, and no "proof" . Gaslighting, no empathy, grandiosity, limiting you, making you small, telling you you are not this or that enough, stealing your ideas, never telling you a good thing about yourself, but all the negative things. The moment you start to shine, they get nervous, jelaous and do everything they can to dimm your light. You are not allowed to shine! Not in their presence. They cant stand it. They cant endure it. Now i saw the pattern, what they all had in common....and had to ask my self: why i loved these people, when instead there were people around me, who liked and loved me, appreciated me, and supported me. Somehow i never payed attention to all these good hearted-meaning people...Now i do : ) To understand how narcism works, made me free!!! To hear from a licensed therapist, a doctor, that: yes! There are people who are not interessed in your well being. Who are evil, with no shame and regret. Who take and take and take and take...and never give back. Oh, Sorry, sometimes the DO give back: they throw you a crumb, so you can survive and go on giving ; )

I alway knew, that there are evil people. But thought, they are far away. That they could be actually around me, that they could be friends, family members and beloved ones, never crossed my mind. You, Dr. Ramani, have put even more light on all my experiences. And this helped me a lot, to understand, to uncovere and to see and feel more clear. And Yes! After all: this is a superpower! I smell narcissist from miles away! I am aware, that i still can fall for it. But as i understand the dynamics, i will be, and have been, out of it much more faster and easier. With no Selfdoubt.

Thank you Dr. Ramani. You mean a lot! Not only for me, but for humanity! Thank you!

Vagrish5

2 days ago

u done gone made me cry God bless you <3 <3 <3 Please share this wisdom forever

gideon karthik

1 week ago

நன்றி. This motivation made me to reshape my life.

vani diana

1 week ago

When I got married I just found out that I actually can sing well, grow plants, cook, craft, write stories. Growing up I never knew I could do them all cause my parents were busy with their own dreams of having academically successful kids.

Girl and Spirit

4 days ago

My story is; After 35 years with a covert narcissistic mother and 10 years of cronic fatigue due to the stress from her, she actually met another man (my dad has dementia since 3 years) and basically didn´t need me anymore. It took me a year to realise that I was better of and now I'm also healing. Slowly I'm getting my life back <3

a blue

1 week ago

This video made me cry... I am 10 months into a narcissistic relationship. I have already lost my sense of self, my morals, values, boundaries (things I never thought I would give up)...so much pain, so much time lost in rumination, tears ...yet I still don't want to end it. I love him so much... and I am ashamed of myself. The cognitive dissonance is paralyzing.

Sune Schoultz

1 week ago

I grew up in a house where my mother was verbally abused to the extreme every single day by my narcissistic dad. I was never good enough for him and from a young age of about 7 years old i started over eating for comfort. I never had any confidence and turning to be overweight my dad saw me as an even bigger disgrace. I was bullied by my older sister who i also believe turned out a semi narcissist........ I am 27 years now and ended up marrying a man just like my dad but he is even worst. we are married for about 2 years now and i have been trying to get out since even before the marriage. I have suffered depression from childhood and being with my husband he has driven me to wanting to kill myself many many times and then the next day he would go on as if nothing happened the previous day. I was hospitalised in desember 2019 for a whole month trying to escape depression and wanting to get away from my husband. sadly i found myself back with him again. He has a very addictive personality as well so all my money has to be spent on his drugs and beer. I am so extremely drained i feel like there is no way out. I fear being alone so very much.. I have a daughter with another daddy who is 4years old and every time my husband would fight with me in front of her and she runs to defend me. How can i do this to my child????? I feel so weak. My heart breaks for her every time. I am at the point where I am so weak , the 5 min love i get from my husband is what I live on.

Melody Weaver

1 week ago

Now I own an independent record label, an ecommerce store, and a photography company. I also wrote a song about my experience with the narc and it was soooo therapeutic and turned out to be my most successful song to this day.

Sew and Design Classes

1 week ago

i was teaching sewing classes. I wanted my student friends to have an opportunity to experience community combined with creativity and problem solving. I enjoyed their conversation and accomplishments. My husband left me on our 39th wedding anniversary, He was unhappy that I didn't have a well paying job. He felt he could never retire. After he left, I took a full time job as a Valet Parking attendant. I was too exhausted and depressed to continue teaching. Covid came along and I became unemployed. I moved away. I packed up my fabrics and machines and put them in storage. I am 62. The world has gone crazy and I am hanging on. My grown children are very supportive. Your videos are helping me work through this long night. Thank you for the encouragement to hold on to my dream.

News that matter

1 week ago

I'm convinced Doctor Ramani speaks from first hand experience dealing with narcissist in a relationship and not just from a professional level.

Virginia E

3 days ago

Hi Dr. Ramani, I love your channel. It has really helped me in my healing quest. I wrote a book about my narcissistic adopted mother that you might find interesting. The book is called, Why is She Like That? (Twenty-three years in the life and times of a little girl from Kansas) My pen name is Virginia Ann Lee. You might like it, or at least find it interesting. I will add the link but not sure it will work here. Thank you for your channel. https://www.amazon.com/WHY-SHE-LIKE-THAT-twenty-three/dp/B087SLGKTM/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Virginia+Ann+Lee&qid=1594780170&s=books&sr=1-1

Amanda Hollingworth

1 week ago

Thank you sooo much Dr Ramani 🥰 I cried listening to you. But as I listened the sadness lessened and the courage for hope and potential started to glow in my heart. 💖

To everyone out there who gets this - you are amazing and have unique gifts this beautiful earth needs 💓💕💖

Brad Rau

4 days ago (edited)

As a professional classical guitarist and music teacher, literally ever person in my life at one point questioned or suggested that I should try something else, or at least stop playing classical music and play whatever style they like, cause in their heads more people will like it. Narcissists for me are just a small subset of 'disbelievers.' They are the loudest and often the first to show up, but are also the easiest to be scared off, if you just don't engage and wait them out. I have gotten really good at tuning people out and following my heart. You have to surround yourself with the right mentors, people who are doing what you want to do. You need their advice in the field, but more important positive attitude and mindset. What narcissistic people what I do is let them talk, let them think they are on 'I'm right' island. Then I leave and do my own thing, and try not to think about how annoying these people are. Arguing is a waste of both of your time. If they want to be on an island of correctness, and no one else is invited then these people are often so isolated they have no idea what is actually going on. By the time they find out, if ever, it is too late, you have succeeded. Then you can be used by them as a source of power, they brag about you, because your achievement is like a achievement for them, but only after it happened.

chester clarke

1 week ago

my narcissist parents destroyed my confidence and caused me to develop anxiety and depression since being a child.

Blackschatten

1 week ago

Thank you Dr. Ramani! I think it's Dr. Ramani's own stories of narcissistic encounters and her success story that we would all benefit from hearing.

Simply Dee’s Journey

5 days ago

Best vid I have watched in a while...... THANK YOU!!

Teia Maceda

19 hours ago

Your content has just unlocked the door .

For eleven years I have struggled.

Being in a bi-racial marriage I believed it was my misunderstandings of a different culture.

I have been thinking he is narcissistic and you nailed it.

He is.

Now 21 years, and we basically get along until he melts down, I see that the past eleven years have melted away from me.

Now at 70 and retired from elder memory care, I was last week looking into the precipice of my own mortality and going through so many feelings.

Through my life I have always picked myself up, reinvented myself and walked on, but this time I cried.

Eleven years living his life instead of my own is what I saw.

With the tools you offer I believe I’ll see my way to reinventing myself again and use the past years grief as stepping stones to move away from the bs even if I must stay with him.

Now I know what he is I can make him own his own cau cau and repell the guilt.

Thank you

Bekin Virgin

1 week ago

Thank you thank you thank you Dr. Ramani!! I was in a 19-year marriage for the last nine years were over the top narcissistic abuse, but I did figure out what it was till the last 2 years of our marriage. Because of it I got adrenal insufficiency which made me very sick the last 2 years of our marriage and I'm still recovering but I'm so much better since I've been out of that relationship for for a little over a year and a half. If I told you what I had suffered you would think I was making it up. As a punishment I was left moneyless, carless, and homeless as I was a stay-at-home mom and wife so he had the whole financial control until the courts got involved which took time and we suffered. Under those circumstances he gave a 30 day notice to our rental of six and a half years which forced us to vacate , and he dumped the whole house on me and two car garage to move alone with our children. I prolonged the marriage because I knew all this was ahead and I didn't want to face the repercussions of divorcing him and punishment that would ensue. So I stayed married longer than I should have at the cost of my physical health and the emotional health of our two girls, which I greatly regret. I'm in a much better place but I have put my dreams on the back burner out of fear a failing, and I'm ready to take flight to get them going. Thank you so much for the encouragement with this video that I needed to hear. I'm going to listen to it again. I have watched several of your videos and appreciate them so much. I also appreciate you and your wisdom. You are beautiful inside and out.

Cynthia Meyers

1 week ago (edited)

When I was young, I had dreams of working in animation and making graphic novels for children for a living. However, I was raised by two narcissistic parents who tried to smother the life out of me. I experienced a lot of physical, emotional, and verbal abuse and I was discouraged from taking any risks in life without their supervision or permission. I also had a lot of attachment problems, too. I frequently tried to move away for college to get away from my parents, but I always experienced bad flashbacks and panic attempts that caused me to fail, drop out, and move back home. I wasn't even studying anything I was passionate about at the time and that certainly didn't help at all.

I was in my 30s when I went to see a private trauma counselor for the first time. Most of the government services were simply ill-equipped to deal with my mental problems. If it weren't for the death of a beloved pet, I doubt I would ever have sought help. It took time, but eventually, I formed a plan with my cousin and escaped my parents' house. I then worked a variety of survival jobs to stay alive and moved to halfway across the country to attend animation school without my parents' interference.

I graduated with honors last year and I was hired by one of the largest studios in the country to work for them. I am still in bad shape due to all the pain my parents have left me with. I'm in my late thirties now and I hope to start a family someday. I hope I can find somebody before it is too late.

Zen Freaq

1 week ago

Thank you for this video. I wrote my story and have had a lot of backlash from narcissists from my past. They want to silence me but instead, I'm going to be more open about my life. My book is called Nomadic Picnic. It's available on Amazon. It's a survivor story (I have C-PTSD.) It feels weird promoting it but I feel like it's the right thing to do. I hope one person in these comments reads it.

Carluza Hunter

4 days ago

Tried to leave twice before...planning to leave for good soon (thinking of a plan first ensures future success) went grey rock...and let just say it's hard to argue with a rock.

IN THE MEANTIME.....

I've been

Working on self love

Working on my negative thoughts/ self doubt

Working on my own mind

Mediating daily

Listening to self help videos and reading articles about my trauma

Saying a prayer for all the woman that are suffering and for those still dealing with the scars.

I 💖 YOU ALL!

Gilmourish Gilmourish

1 week ago

I have four sisters. When I turned 30 I told my dad I wanted to buy a house. He laughed at my face.

All my sisters have a house except me. My father kept withheld money from an inheritance from me until someone came to tell me the money was for me. All my sisters were in the com plot, they all knew and said nothing.

My eldest sister asked me twice “if I were to give you an amount of money, what would you do with it”. I said “ I want to buy myself a house”. She never said anything about that money put aside. By the time I knew it wasn’t enough for a down payment anymore as prices sky rocketed. They all have a house, paid for and I am still renting. It is hard to forgive. I still talk to them but not with pleasure, I keep away.

Kate Becker

3 hours ago (edited)

My story: I have a sister who is 10 years older than me. I’ve always worked with or for her since I was 15. She’s successful. Has a business, real estate agent, does it all. She has always made snarky comments to me about my life. “Why would you go to that college? That’s trashy.” “Why would you move their? They are all losers.” “Why are you getting married to him? Are you knocked up?” She’s always said the most hurtful, unsupportive words. I never understood why. As for myself, I am empathetic, and wanted to change the situation. Thinking that maybe if she saw my actions. Maybe if I prayed a little harder. She would change. Not only have I lost all my dreams and goals because of continuing to work with her, my I have forgotten my authentic self. She has made me second guess all my thoughts and decisions, and worse, I believe it. I almost gave up on marrying my best friend because of her.

But Today, I am leaving the job where we work, and getting married in 6 weeks! My supportive, loving and kind fiancé are moving away and I am so excited! New job, fresh start. I can’t wait to start a life I’ve always wanted.

Katie Mason

1 week ago

I was brainwashed during my childhood/youth that my sister “was the smart one” and I “was the pretty one”. My entire self worth was based upon my appearance. It was truly debilitating. I ended up in modeling school and becoming anorexic. I still to this day, at the age of 51 find it difficult to think of myself as worthy enough. I did however graduate from college with a 3.84 GPA, mainly as a big F-You to my parents. I also started getting back into my art again. I have sold several of my paintings and I am currently writing a screen play. I also just bought a house. My closing was last week.

Brooke McPhail

1 week ago

My fiance's daughters (15 & 16) just escaped their mother on July 6th. I can't wait to see them soar. If only the judicial system will listen to them and their father this time...

Venora Dobrowolski

5 days ago

This is so true for me that I am in tears.

Josette Newsam

5 days ago

Thank you for this Doctor Ramani. This is definitely my story. Not to give too much detail, but it was a “friend” who I believed wanted to be encouraging however they never wanted me to outshine them so when they thought what I was doing would, they knew how to make me doubt myself. When I got wise and that no longer worked, they found other ways. There’s so much more to it but I never know who will see this public post. I do really appreciate your channel. I needed this.

Kirsty Bell

1 week ago

I finally understood after 16 years that I was being gaslighted and that both people involved where narcissists. I ended up leaving and it’s been difficult due to the pandemic but it’s worth it to have peace of mind. I can’t stress enough how manipulative these types of people are and when i finally made my decision how free I felt. I feel I have a future now and I understand how Doctor Romani feels when she speaks about being angry at the manipulative nature of the narcissist and how that can impact a person from their full potential.

Seeking Catharsis

1 week ago

I needed to hear this. I’m a week and two days into my escape from my husband. We were together for half a decade. I helped him start his business, dropped out of grad school, and put my own startup on hold to help him. He encouraged me not to finish school and to save money and learn from him instead so we could build a business together. He has three Ivy League degrees.In return, I’ve made less money than I have ever made professionally and shortly after we married I found out he was had been serially cheating on me the entire time. I just received my GRE exam prep books and plan to apply to business school to help me get my startup off the ground. I’m staying in a safe house across the country, sleeping on a twin bed but I have so much hope for my future. The beauty of it all is that I didn’t even know I was being abused for the first 5 years and had resources like yours to help me understand the danger I was in. It’s been 8 months since I have been made aware of NPD and while I will never get the time we spent together back, this channel help give me presence of mind to know that one more day with him was a day I could not afford to waste. I’m hurt but I will move forward with empathy and compassion. No one would choose to have this awful disorder, so all I can do is pray for his recovery and work towards mine - separately. Happy healing everyone ❤️!

Vanessa P.

6 days ago

I survived being raised by 2 narcicist. I'm nearly detached from both of them. Only see/talk one of them when other family around. Thanks to your channel I've been able to do this and deal with the guilt and shame I felt when I even thought of taking distance. Now I do it proudly for myself and my spouse- who couldn't be happier I took those steps. Thank you Dr. Ramani 🙏

35 years late. I am too old now to do anything. I no longer have dreams of anything. It's just putting one foot in front of the other and getting divorced.

Free Thought Domain

1 week ago

Thank you Dr Ramani.

Despite the attempts to hold me back I refused to be held back, I fulfilled my dreams in spite of the attempts to crush me. I have achieved a BSc (Hons) plus another year of Psychology. I certificate in fitness to be a personal trainer that he was so jealous over because that was “his dream”. Jobs in the fitness industry (there was a time he was in constant competition with me when we worked at the same place). I left him and went to work in my dream job way away from him, where I ended up with a grandiose Narcissist. He was probably worse. He insisted I maintained a slim figure to be the “perfect partner” while simultaneously insisting we eat junk food and drink copious amounts of alcohol all the time! It was when I was searching for answers during this relationship I found out about narcissistic personality disorder. Eventually I stopped drinking and got fit and healthy and slim (again) then I left him 🤣.

I have reconciled with my ex-husband, he has healed a lot, now he is not as controlling and suppressing as he was when we were married. I suspect he was more borderline personality disorder (he did actually get that diagnosis, but seems to have forgotten) with narcissistic tendencies, but the abuse was very similar.

Natalie Montez

1 week ago

This video touched me so deeply in my personal situation. I am still in mine but trying to get out and relearn how to live a life without anxiety, retrain myself to sleep and out my energy back into my kids and myself full time. I am devastated over the time lost and so scared for the road ahead. I am honestly feeling paralyzed. Living overseas, COVID situation, and the unrest in the U.S. I just feel lost. It's so true that he shows all his bright and shining charm to everyone else but I heard a quote recently that said something like, "there comes a time when chosing peace over making your point is more important". I know it's time to stop worrying about if he or anyone else will get it. I have lost enough. It's just a matter of taking that first step on that journey and not looking back. I can't believe how much of myself he has stolen on top of the same situation I grew up in. I'm a mess

Reign

1 week ago

Before I was adopted I always had a love for science. After 23 years of abuse, I no longer felt like I was good enough.

As I started to regain my self esteem ,it felt as if the family was coming at me full force to take me down. I could not think straight and dropped my chemistry class 5 times before my first test because of fear. What I did not know was cutting out all the narcissists in my life would empower me.

Shortly after going no contact I took three chemistry courses and aced each one. I have a passion to go into health care and I am on the road to help others heal.

As for all of us narcissistic abuse is devastating. The pain of going through it and letting go is the worst thing to experience. I am almost two years no contact and although I may not get the life I’ve always dreamed of. You can be certain I’m going to get out there and try.

Dear fellow survivor, I know your pain all to well. Empower yourself and break free from the abuse. Nothing that the narcissist says about you is true. Do not believe their lies.

Bree Lebran

1 week ago (edited)

Being raised by a covert narcissist, I see how much the abuse was so so subtle. Literally my parents supporting me, but under strict supervision and shouting out for every decision I take without them. When I gave up, because I'm not good enough they shame talk me that I don't believe in my dreams and that I should have more self esteem. It's so incredibly sick.

I still have the voice inside, shame talking me. I hate myself for not being able to move on faster.

I have been taking my distance since last year, landed a job I'd never thought I would have. It's incredible. And I didn't tell them. The next step is to move with not leaving an address.

Katherine Burthardt

1 week ago

Dr. Ramani, I legit need to schedule a session with you!!

Linda Firth

1 week ago

It was a covert senior manager.

I felt I was going insane - it didn't make any sense, I was constantly invalidated.

I was stressed and depressed.

I gave up my dream career to break free.

I'm still broken but recovering. I'm still angry but now understand the truth.

It wasn't me at fault at all.

I'm trying to prove my case in court because I lost too much financially.

I'm facing this demon head on and preparing for the court battle.

I've learnt so much since leaving work, especially about human behaviours.

I've collected evidence which has shocked me, that managers can be so dishonest.

It's making me stronger, much stronger.

If I can bring myself to present this evidence and be challenged in Court, I know I can then do anything.

Thank you, just thank you for explaining this so clearly.

This should be taught in schools - the demons are people we should be looking up to.

lasvegasloner

1 week ago

This also reminds and teaches me how complicated it can get. I know many these days are now pretending or believing they know as much as you do about narcissism, blaming others for it when they are simply being brats and expect to do whatever they want at the job and can't be critiqued or guided. They get others to back them up like little fan clubs until they help each other never actually do the job or learn from me or other managers how to do it right-- they just plow through making chaos and more problems we have to fix, while we wait for them to learn the job. The most sickening thing is watching them treat me or somebody else like they're the problem, then after screwing up the job enough times or experimenting with things I already told them might cause specific problems... eventually take MY ideas or come up with a new eloquent description of basically the same thing I was trying to teach them... and claim them as their own. The whole time some of their co-workers watching me as if I'm the one who wants credit, simply because I voiced a couple times how I thought I was being treated unfairly. It's like they think it's Disney land just for them instead of a job.

Meanwhile, I HAVE been managed by a narcissist for years, and yes it does rub off but luckily I already did enough instruction in other jobs that I can be fair in my mind and with good employees I give compliments and empower them. I know many that are doing fine and know more than I do about the job now and that's a good thing, and I encouraged them because they were trying hard to get things right.

So yeah, it all seems so simple to me, to just be fair, but what actually happens is getting very very complicated on the job. Being manipulated by one side while younger ones manipulate me from the other, and nobody seems to care. They also mistake niceness for weakness. It's many people and I wondered what a psychologist thought of how things are changing with time and what creates this new age of what I'm noticing are waves of very slick, part-time narcissists or maybe hipster narcissists LOL. The boss is just straight up narcissistic with all sorts of the classic things you mentioned, with little games here and there knowing just what to say to keep you down, and making sure they stay ahead of you, filling in the blanks with fast talk and an amazing ability to weave real data with generalized confident but false statements, only for them to clean up their mistake later and never admit to the change in their data. Always the smartest in the room. Always. Even when they're wrong.

The new style isn't half that ambitious; they just act like if you try to keep the work from disaster because they're doing whatever they want instead of the techniques and protocols you give, that YOU'RE the one that is "negative" or fill in the blank with any new buzz word you can think of to make you feel out of touch, and out of line with the latest social adjustments. Even if you know and try to explain how they're glossing over the problem, they stay smug and can look you right in the face while twisting things around, wasting your time with the next done half-truths with confidence their "data" backs them up, even with it's non-applicable. It's horrible. I hate the new style just as much as the overlord, scared dictator gas-lighting style. It seems even more delusional. Makes me think I never had anything to offer, never knew anything, and it's actually coming true!! I have forgotten so much of my old ideas and the paths I was on to contributing, but once in a while I get flashes of it back and it makes me so angry. I was actually ahead of some experts on TV with some of my ideas, but I was questioned so much by one or the other with their jargon, and I knew they didn't like that I came up with it, I KNEW it. They just had to re-word what I was saying with fancy new jargon as if I wasn't good enough, but the whole concept they never came up with at all!! They never said ANY of it before I did! I feel like years and years of my life has been wasted. Now I don't know what to do because I'm older and can't prove my old ideas, others have since come up with the same ideas years after, and I don't think anybody would want me now that I'm burnt out and can't remember things very well anymore.

Kim R

1 week ago

"They need you, more than you need them"

So true. I lost my job because of him, lost my successful career, lost money, lost my health. After 4 years realised what he is and all the promises he made like getting married, helping me financially while I stayed home with the kids were a lie. Looking forward to separating and building my life back up again.

jareya

5 days ago

Wonderful video Dr Ramani, your compassion and concern for others always comes through. This is highly appreciated and hopefully will help give some of us more courage in such difficult situations.

April Day

1 week ago

Thank you Dr. Ramani for educating us all on narcissism! I grew up with a narcissistic mother and recently left a narcissistic boyfriend. Still actively working on healing from it all but feeling hopeful!

Sandra Blake

5 days ago

I agree, DR. Ramani, this is the greatest video you have made👍🏻!

My, BIGGEST SUCCESS STORY, is leaving the Narc after 40 years of a horrifying marriage. Had to quit three good jobs, I truly enjoyed, and was successful in, quit College, forfeited a beautiful home n every thing in it😢.

But, now I’m enjoying my older years, having time to go to interesting places, meet new social friends that have invited me into their circles of different hobbies, n interests, that I had to let go to the wayside, after marrying a Narc.

I also had to quit masseuse school while married to him. But, not I can’t afford to finish school to become a licensed masseuse, or fulfill my dream of having my own business in that field. However, my daughter with whom I’m living, bought me a new massage table, set it up in a spare bedroom and all the ambiance atmosphere. Now I give massages to my family members, and closest friends. Of course, no charge😊.

Not only am I feeling successful once again, but, needed for my talent👍🏻. I’m enjoying many other arts that I had to relinquish, such as writing poetry, gardening, medical research, and learning much more than imagined about the healing herbs, that helped keep me well, during those dark, n trying days of my life with a nasty toxic Narc. 👿.

Thank you again Dr. Ramani, for being a part of my healing program, and your constant encouragement to keep moving forward with my talents, and to rekindle those lost desires😘🥰👍🏻🙏🏼

Manal M K

1 week ago

You made me cry today doc .. Love you ...feels so relieved and strong listening to you ...cant describe how much each and every word of yours makes sense to me ...

Sara Temme

1 week ago

When I met my ex husband my small business was just beginning to finally see success. Over the next couple years it got better and better, and he saw it as emasculating. After out children were born I decided to take a break, and he used that as an opportunity to break me completely. I was a failure at the business or else I would have been able to handle it while raising 2 infants (on my own, since he was never home). I was a bad mother for wanting more. It turned into me being a bad mother a few years later for wanting a job- my income would have to pay for the childcare because he wasn’t going to pay someone to do “my job” when I went and “traipsed of to have fun all day.” I could write a book. I started working on my self esteem and taking a couple classes here and there- which I had to pay for myself out of scrap work- although he’s a banker with a 6 figure income. Fast forward 5 years from the first class I took (online, at a community college, a research writing class): I’m finishing a masters degree, just landed an amazing job, have gained a reputation among my peers I am endlessly proud of. My kids are proud of me and tell me that even when I am stressed out and busy. I am doing things I never thought possible- like paying off my car, remodeling my house on my own, and traveling by myself with my kids. I’m living the life I always dreamed of. We divorced 2 years ago and it has been a ride- I didn’t really know all that was going on until after the divorce was final and he thought he had no reason to be fake with me anymore. Suffice to say my whole 12 year relationship with him was an absolute fabrication- and gaining my confidence has been a journey. But now I feel more like myself than ever, I love myself more than I ever thought possible, I know I am competent and capable and excellent in whatever I set my mind to. I agree that this is one of the worst things they do- because everything attached rots until you’re empty to your core. I could not have named a single goal or aspiration at one point. Now I’m achieving them all and setting my goals higher and higher. Thank you Dr. Ramani for your content- it’s so important and healing.

Cathy Risley

1 week ago

7-year marriage, 10 years total, with my narc, but I finally divorced him 6 months ago and bought my own house. I gave up relationships with my 2 children, my friends (except for the few he approved of), my health (I now have asthma and lost my ability to run distance), and the best job I've ever had. When I got that job, which was part-time, he made my life a living hell by lecturing me daily about how much money he would have to "make up" for the change in my income. My happiness and fulfillment in that job meant absolutely nothing to him. I finally caved in and quit, just after the 3-months of probationary training were completed, thereby ruining any chance of getting rehired by that company. The irony is that while I was working full-time, he complained every day that I wasn't free to take long weekends with him whenever he wanted. There was no pleasing him, no winning.

He is addicted to porn, addicted to sex, addicted to alcohol (lost custody of his only child when he was arrested for DUI with her in the vehicle), but everybody wants to be his friend. I have yet to hear anybody realize what he is, other than my family and my therapist. He has most people fooled. But I am healing and starting to rebuild my friendships. I am laughing again! I love being in charge of myself and my life, making my own decisions, totally free to be me exactly as I am. I feel like I have dug myself up from a grave and am coming to life again. He damn near killed my soul.

Dr. Ramani's videos were my crash course last summer and gave me the absolute clear-eyed understanding of what was going on. This one is spot on. Here's to our dreams and our potential!

Melissa Wells

1 week ago

Thank you!! This makes so much sense :)

Renee Elias

1 week ago

I gave up precious time with my kids, including one with autism, to try meet his unrealistic expectations.

I lost my home and my business, while trying to help pay for “my” narcissist’s failing business. (He left me soon after the money ran out.)

When asked, after the breakup, what I enjoy doing in my free time, I couldn’t come up with a single thing.

Even though almost 9-months have passed, it still hurts.

BUT...day by day I get stronger, and I’m finally starting to remember who I used to be. Now, I read books, work out, paint, take my kids to the places WE want to go, and watch awesome and empowering videos (mostly by Dr. Ramani)!!! I completed my teacher certification program, and am now a special education elementary school teacher. I love it!

I won’t lie, I’m still just taking baby steps as I continue to heal. It’s a slow process, but I now have more good days than bad, and that’s huge for me! : ) And...I’m even prepared, now, to actually respond when asked what I enjoy doing!

HANG IN THERE EVERYONE!

Birdie Blue

1 week ago (edited)

Thank you for your honesty. It was clarified for me that it is still ok to be angry about this evil.

Scouse Mouse

1 week ago

Whenever I would apply for a job my Dad would scoff 'Don't you have to be clever to do that'? Or 'Are you going to be a brain Surgeon next week.?The best one was 'Why don't you try and be a bit more like Karen (younger Sister by 2.5 years).

jini MURRAY

1 week ago

At 71, I am only just learning about narcissism. Realize now WHY I have never had any goal dreams aspirations

My mother thought I was an Extention of her. At 57, reaching out to help her - she snarled, (friend had said how nice I looked) ? Did she hear that? She demanded she was not going anywhere with me dressed like “THAT!” Do I honor my mother. - now I realize I was wrong. It was not honoring her to change...I could never figure out WHY the only desires I had was to hurry end my life & die. I was only one left to care for her last 14 years of her life. I cried out to God... now I am learning how I starting to live no longer desiring to die- but rejoicing all the blessings been given me. I realize how evil has prevailed but

In CHRIST now I can do all things. He is turning what devil intended for evil for good. He has given me a gift in art. (I have no idea) But I need income- so, let’s see what the LORD WILL DO?

Thank you for your teaching. I don’t understand all the terminology of what you’re saying, but I will get it soon enough, I’m sure. Thank you 🙏🏽

marguerite ndi

1 week ago

I'm a "living business ideas factory " . Yes, literally. And I would always share them with my ex husband, because to me, it was only natural as we were in the same team or so I thought . He would always have shrug his shoulders or have that annoyed look in his eyes, and tell me the idea is either dumb or non original. It happened a couple of time, then I found out that he has put several of them in place without me knowing. He would would involve his friends or family members and then tell me I wasn't good enough. Most of the time he would even dent that the idea was mine in the first place. At the beginning of each semester he would threaten not to pay my tuition at the slightest arguments ( my Visa didn't allow me to work, i was totally depending on him) but I fought tooth and nails to go to school. He won't help with the kids,when I had my homeworks. I remembered carrying my youngest on few months on the back, while fixing the dishes for the following week, while taking care of the 2 years old and working on my Advanced College Algebra' s homework that were due in less than an hour. I'm divorced now since 2014 😃 I graduated last semester, I'm currently putting in place several of my business ideas, while raising my children in a happy, tension free and manipulation free environment, I have so many goals and ambitions, I take care on myself and I'm gradually reaching my goals and fulfilling my dreams. It's so important to me to set a different tone for my children to offer them another alternative. I will not let their father put them down and make them feel less of themselves ( has their grand father did to their fathe)

Ken Francis

3 days ago

I am sad to think that a channel exists on YouTube that is built around existing with someone with a personality disorder. Narcissists, borderlines, and others with personality disorders are all a product of family pain. Heal yourself before trying to label and cope with others.

The ACA Serenity Prayer:

God, Grant me the serenity to accept the people I can not change,

The courage to change the one I can,

And the wisdom to know that one is ME.

Darrell DINO Long

1 week ago

Yes it has, and I'm trying to fight though it.

narkoza

1 week ago

The saddest thing I Lost by being with him was that I Lost being myself . Whenever we were with friends, family members and other people he didnt even allow me to talk. He had to be the funniest, the smartest, the loudest. I was just there to nod my head.

And also I lost almost 6 years without my little sister.

Mitch Michael

1 week ago

i come from a dysfuntional family. was in addiction i believe because of that have listened to your videos . clean for seven years . discovered through the videos that my mom is a covert narcisist. only recently began to understand the abuse .love your videos trying to place bounderies

Felix Ebanks

1 week ago

I was with a narcissist; we have a child together. I was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder. The toxicity of the relationship, had such a profound impact on my mental health. Ironically when we separated, this was the very thing she used to limit contact with my son. In the 3 years since experiencing symptoms of my bipolar. I only experience mania once; which was in a hospital setting. How ever since I was better and had returned to the relationship, I battled with depression. Whenever I’d try to say it’s the way your treating me which triggering my lows; she gaslight and say it’s my bipolar. After three years trying maintain good mental health stability in the relationship, I came to the conclusion that it would be literally impossible. I also knew she had genuine no concerns of me being able to take care of my so as I regularly watch on my days off from work while she was work. I decided enough was enough and I left the family home. Despite I was never a risk to my son, maintained full tome work as a healthcare professional. She did exactly that; applied to court despite our child minder and friends advising her not to. She accused me of wanted to abduct her son which was later dismissed. She weaponised my condition saying I’m a risk to my son. Well, since I’ve left the narcissist in my life. My bipolar has been in remission for over a year now, I’ve not have to take a single sick day off work. I’m be discharged from my CPN service due the good standing of my mental; dispute the stresses of court. I still it’s amazing how I’m able to deal with the stresses of court but I couldn’t withstand the constant sand papering of confidence, my dreams and happiness.

Stellaria

1 week ago

Yes so true, this is prob the most important topic of all relating to narcissistic abuse.

Randall DeMichel

1 week ago

Thank you Dr. for this enlightening presentation. It has confirmed the causes of what I’ve dealt with since I was 12 years old, and maybe before that.

My own mother was a narcissist. She is now 92 and has dementia. But the scars she left have plagued me my whole life, and made me think I was to blame. I am 69 now and , with God’s help, I’ve been able to find the reasons for my feelings of inferiority and belittlement, lack of self- confidence , fear and self-doubt. It’s been an ongoing war within . I’ve pushed myself beyond reasonable limits in my jobs as a truck driver and everything else I’ve done to make sure that I could have some confidence and affirmation. And, unfortunately, I pushed myself and obtained a few bad injuries in the process . I’ve tried to put myself beyond defeat by suppressing my feelings and using hostility and anger to overpower things or people that I was afraid would overcome me. I cared a lot for others, but at the same time I was totally defensive and eventually became aggressive and went on the offense, to make sure I got the first advantage in a situation. As I said, it was a war, and I used warfare tactics to win. Because if I lost , it would confirm to me what failure I really felt like.

All my life I had fear of failure and criticisms and could not overcome these.

It made me acquiesce when I attempted anything. I either quit after starting or quit before I even got started. And I doubted that any preparation I made was adequate. I didn’t have a way to guarantee success , so I just didnt try.

This left me feeling worthless and totally inadequate .

But my mother used to tell me that I didn’t care about anyone but myself, and other like statements. And she deprived me of bonding and affection when I was very young. She divorced my father and was away every day because she had to work. And she preferred her social life to her children.

In the military I was pretty successful. The were going to give me an early promotion because I did good work. But I was told that I didn’t have the character. So all my efforts were not beneficial to me, because I didn’t know how to have the good character that they were asking for. I became as self-reliant as I could but it was never enough, and I was full of fears that someone would find out my problem and then reject me. I had a terrible time with rejection also

But I have definitely turned a corner now, and I’m on a path to heal. I would also like to point out that the Native American teachings are very good and helpful. They didn’t treat their children in these ways. They regard them as a sacred gift from the Creator. However, modern civilized society has brought them a lot of problems and difficulty, too .

Anne Mehlfeld

1 week ago (edited)

Wow, I could hear in your voice how emotional this topic is for you.

And I agree. The wings clipping, destroying of dreams and hopes is the worst.

I spent my teenage year thinking I was just an awkward, unlikable, clumsy person. Not pretty enough, fat (actually just chubby, but ya know), tomboyish, loud...

I was bombarded with nasty remarks by my narc brother all day everyday. Pushed around, literally, for being "in the way". Much like the ugly duckling.

I grew up believing that I needed to be thankful for the little amount of friends that I had, that I needed to apologize and lay down what a clutz I actually am and to be glad if someone liked me anyway. I actually have a lot of interests and talents but I would not push getting better at them because I always thought my place was in second row, if at the front at all...

I am happy to say that I consider myself a success now by my own standards.

I got rid of toxic friendships, I learned to say no and to be honest with people without being afraid of the consequenses. I have learned to lead a life more free and less burdened by doubts and fears. They are still there, but not very often and I have learned to accept them as normal and as managable.

I have a lot of friends that admire me for my thrength, that look up to me, want my advice and simply miss me when I'm not there. I have learned that there are people who let me come back when I made a mistake or had a bad day. They want me in their life. I learned that time spent with me is fun for many people. That it's more than worthwhile being close to me. And I have the best and most loving boyfriend I could ever have imagined. (My narc brother of course told me that I'd never be in a relationship.)

My wings, fortunately, have not been clipped, they had just been tied together with a very strong rope. But I'm fine now and I bet that many of us will be fine one day, too.

Breanna Albiero

1 week ago

My father is a narcissist, I also worked with him for 10 years to long. He kept pulling me farther & farther down the drain to the point I didn’t even know who I was. Complete stripped me of my confidence in every way. I was having panic attacks, anger issues & fear that if I left I wouldn’t be able to make it on my own. That I would not live my life without his “assistance”. Towards the “end” it finally got taken to far, to the point I felt it would not only continue to damage my mental/emotional heath, growth but also my physical heath as well. One day, he cornered me in my very small office yelling & getting in my face like he was challenging me to fight. Almost like he wanted to provoke me to get physical since he new I had a temper. I told him he needed to leave or let me out because my anxiety was getting to me & I needed fresh air...his response was “good” it was at than moment that I new I needed out & realized how much he got off on my reactions, mental & emotional decline. After that I decided to take the “risk” & quit. Even though the environment was toxic I had the fear of landing another toxic job & thought that I might stay since I at least new his patterns. Now I can say I’m so happy I left. In all honesty the journey was a little bumpy BUT I feel so much better & have been working on my emotional & mental healing. Since this quarantine he’s tried to come back & “help” by giving me money. Which upset me because I new it came with a price. A narcissist doesn’t just give without any expectations. I decided to accept the money only because I felt I deserved it from all the hard work I did & everything he put me through. In all honesty though accepting that money made me feel like I was making a deal with the devil. Sure enough he started calling & texting me more for any little reason including asking if I used the money for rent & if I used the grocery money for groceries. Or even where I was at or who I was with. At that point I felt like those were his attempts to gain another grasp on me. So I decided to take control by not answering his calls & calling him back when I was ready to speak with him. When he text I did not text back right away I would wait hours or even a day to reply. In addition to that & energy/healing I feel he may have finally got the hint. At least for now. I also felt good because I felt I was in my power by taking control of when I felt comfortable speaking to him. He new I lost my job due to this pandemic so thought I was mental & emotionally down in the dumps doing worse off now that I wasn’t working for him anymore. Little does he know I have the strength, courage & inner power of a tiger & will fight for myself. Even though since I left there has been ups & downs. I am SO HAPPY I decided to leave, best decision I had ever made for myself & I will never go back to where I was before. Even though it’s been a struggle I am great full for those struggles because everything I experienced with him taught me so much in regards to red flags & dating. Someone who leaves a narcissist & starts to heal themselves sees through the BULLSHIT of anyone. Tune into your intuition, trust your gut & get the fuck out. For your own sanity because they will take you down with them or watch you fall & step on your fingers as you are hanging off the cliff you are clinging to. For anyone out there debating on leaving, trust me. It’s for your own good, trust that you will be safe & protected & that you will come across the right people to assist you in your healing. They might stalk & slander you but just know, karmas a bitch. You will be so much better off without them.

Paulo

1 week ago

Yes, you are so right, i'm opening NEW space in my mind, new time, for me only, for my life only.

Enrique Mora

1 week ago

Thank you, thank you , thank you Dr. Ramani. Hopefully I will find a way out and rise from the ashes

Laila Ibrahim

6 days ago

Thank you for this video Dr Ramini. I was raised by an abusive narc mother and scapegoated all my life. I moved away at 20 and ended up spending my whole 20s in a terrible relationship with a man who was the same if not a worse abuser than my mother. I started my life up twice from scratch because of them and it took me an extra 3 years to heal from my second blow. I am now almost healed (still have a few triggers especially when it comes to boundaries) But I am definitley more clear in my thinking. I can see right through.a narc and grey rock them easy. I started a business which they were all trying to sabotage but it is going well even in lockdown time. I am most proud because my business didn't only survive my narc mom and sis but also my narc ex best friend who couldnt bare the idea of me succeeding. They tried to sabotage my business several times but they failed because this time I came with a stronger spirit, I know who I am and what I bring to the table. They couldn't accept it because I had a brittle spirit which they enjoyed taunting before. Too bad for them, I have arrived being my best self and loving myself too. I don't give people second chances anymore and I'm good with that.

Robyn Lund

1 week ago

This one hit home big-time! Thank you, Dr. Ramani. You have articulated this issue beautifully. I will say it’s never too late even if you are in your senior years. When you realize how petty, how jealous and how mean-spirited the narcissist actually is, it is staggering. I found it hard to comprehend. And when I realize that my parents were deliberately keeping me down I was very angry. And of course those of us who had those nasty narcissistic parents, often pick nasty narcissistic partners. And so you succeed with one arm tied behind your back. And when you do succeed the narcissist resent you for it. So you don’t dare share your success. You can never be too high and you can never be too low. Because if they think you’re having a hard time they will rub it in. The best thing is no contact with any of them. This is a beautiful video and I thank you for it!

anharali zaman

1 week ago

Crystal, this advice has really changed people. Thank you!

JoMama123451234

1 week ago

Thank God i didnt give up everything for her, but I strayed from the path I was on. I was a hopeful young man with big goals and dreams, doing well in college, playing in a few bands. Thats when i met my narcassitic ex. She initially supported me and was my biggest fan. But quickly she hated me being successful. She didnt want to hear about my good grades or my new job. Over and over again, she made it all about her. I felt like I had to put my life on hold for her. And then all the future faking, over and over again. Promising all these things and never following through. I sadly became numb to it, until she finally discarded me for the new guy she was with.

All the cheating, the verbal and physical abuse, the lies and manipulation, tore me apart. It destroyed my confidence, my trust, any little self love that I had.

I let her in, told her everything about me, and she used it against me. Told me i would never find anyone else and blamed me for her cheating. Told me I was selfish over and over again. I started to believe it. Gaslit me to the point i didnt know what was real or not. I actually believed it was all my fault and that I was a terrible boyfriend and person.

Its been 3 months since i blocked her on everything. In that time, i got back to my music, made a few new songs, studying to get into grad school, and working at an elementary school for kids with behavioral/emotional issues.

Im still healing. I know it will take a while. 4 years of abuse doesnt heal overnight. But I am still here, clawing my way back with a new purpose a new life. I wont stop because I know those 4 years dont define me. I hsve so many dreams and goals and I believe this is a blessing in disguise. My day will come. I know it.

Anne Niquette

1 week ago

Wow! I feel like you were the ugly kn the wall of my life for 17 years. So grateful that I got away from him, although we are STILL discussing md getting the rest of my stuff after 3-1/2 years! I am slowly building a business and taking classes. It's amazing feeling like I am ME again!

Yati Bailey

1 week ago

I thank you for the clear explanations.. I must cust my cord amd soar. BE FREE...🥰🥰

Anto V

1 week ago

Drop my Degree at the bigining of our relationship due to drama that appeared always around my exam time. 10 years after and one year narck free I'm back to college!

Annie Mundy

1 week ago

Thank you. That was beautiful. Really resonated. I cried too.

Jason Gray

1 week ago

When the BPDs and the narcissists try to destroy your life they often work in teams. When they do this they have a weakness. They lie to each other. When they team up they each have a clear objective in mind about what they will do and how it will end. Except that the end product is different for each one. The one that is the most evil intends to destroy you. Find out what each one is lying about. Then get them together in front of a bunch of people. (Can't do this for a while, obviously.) Go over the lies that each one of them has told. Put a spin on it that makes them look like slimewads for lying. It is so funny watching them come undone.

As a kid someone asked me to envision myself as an adult but like a character on a TV show. What would I be like? I cooked it up in my mind. I would have clothes with hidden pockets and I would always get out of a jam with hidden objects. (Like Batman only not exactly). I would have mad computer skills. And I would have a really cool car. Well now I just need the car. There is life after jerks and I am proof of that. I don't keep anything that any of them gave me. Also there was a video game that I only played during the short time one of them was around me. I went ahead and played it again. Sure enough it was that "as long as you never do this again" reinforcement. I purposefully broke the suggestions and went around telling others how to do the same. I figure I can be like Knight Rider or Columbo and set out to tear down the things that evil people are trying to do.

Jennifer Last

1 week ago

My mom limited my dreams, and didnt believe In me and keep me under her foot. She basically with held me back from dreams, and was like things would be too hard for me. I feel held back. I was their servant, they had little value for me. Both my parents think I'm a dead weight even though I'm a work in progress and I'm doing well.

Mona Patel

1 week ago

I dated one....Left him told me I should work less. Always insecure, about literally everything, where I want, who I went out with , Insecure I would run off with another guy. Been a month, My business I had always wanted to take more time in investing and growing has taken off. Definitely can relate to the feeling freer...but it has been a difficult Journey. Cutting them off if the best.

Gina Maharaj

1 week ago

My sister and mother are Narcs and I’ve been abused for years. Even now, after my husband passed (now it’s family abandonment)

CM Ralph

1 week ago

I was in an online/long-distance relationship with a covert narcissist who invalidated my very existence by refusing to tell anyone in her life that I or our relationship even existed. After about a year I discovered this. I had been essentially reduced to an interactive computer game. I suspect she did this because I am transgender and she was simply too ashamed of who and what I am to admit I or our relationship existed. I immediately ended the relationship when I became clear on this and went 100% no contact. The constant ruminations and cognitive dissonance cleared almost immediately for me and it did feel like losing 300 pounds. But the pain of her invalidation still haunts me. I am 65 and I honestly believe I will never be able to trust or fall in love ever again. She broke something inside of me that I can't seem to repair or reclaim.

Lien

1 week ago

The moment that my ex partner did not attend my swearing on as a registrar made me realise that there was something terribly wrong. It was a very big moment for me and he made it awfull not to be there. Thank you dr. Ramani for making me understand. It took me 2 years to come with terms with my decision. Now I am greatfull for not having to live under a dark cloud! And cut my hair the way i wanted 😀

Rosemary Lee

5 days ago

Firstly thank you I have only just begun to realise why I never backed myself and why I haven’t been pursuiting my dreams and that it was due to my narcissistic mum always destroying my confidence and value I placed on them. You hit the nail on the head when you spoke about getting exhausted and just giving up,as that is exactly what happened. At 16 despite always planning on going to uni I walked away from school and went into the workforce as I realised two more years of school plus 4 years of uni with my mum determined to make my life hell and destroy any chance of success a uni was more than I could cope with I was done. I jus needed to leave home and become independent ASAP if I was not to mentally dissolve completely. However, whilst only 3 years ago at the age of 53 did I finally put all the pieces together and realise that all her antagonism towards me was due to NPD i made a promise to me when I left school I would get to uni I wasn’t going to let her have that dream,. It took 16 years to accomplish that dream as I had to battle one obstacle after another to get my way in but in 2004 I graduated with a communication degree. The child that my mum has told everyone is not to smart and has learning disabilities, the child she told should marry and tried to set up on dates with every boy that had a learning disability, the child that was put down and treated like trash by her, the child that she supported and encouraged others to treat like trash the one who was told daily she was stupid, she was an idiot the child that was told that everything was to difficult for her ie don’t try that it will Beto difficult for you graduated from Australia’s top communication degree a degree that at that time was harder to get into than medicine I cannot tell you how great it felt. Yes she did rob me of some major dreams that are now not possible to follow but I also know that I never allowed myself to believe her or what everyone in my family said about me. I was and still am the scapegoat but I consider that in some ways to be a blessing as it allowed me to see beyond the mask to challenge what was being said both in whether it was something ‘normal’ and healthy for anyone to say but especially a mum and then the validity also having had her tell so many lies about me and to me meant I saw those cracks as well so a lot of stuff was destroyed or disarmed by me it was more just the why? That had me and for ages believing it was me as it happened with no one else. I thought you may like to know that one survivor didn’t give up.

Barky Barker

1 week ago

I'm going through this right now. Narc wife wants to uproot me to move closer to her family and new job, just as my new business is taking off. Nope not gonna do it.

Girl Girl

1 week ago

Oh my god, Dr Ramani, you’ve made me tear up... 😢😔 this is amazing video, thank you very much! I am in the middle the fight with the demons of my family’s narcissism... it is so hard when other people clipped your wings and then you start doing the same to yourself... but like you’ve said, day by day, brick by brick I’m going to work on bringing back faith in myself...

DoctorRamani

Adela Covarrubias A.

1 week ago

thank you dr. Ramani, your video made me cry. I recently left a narcissistic relationship that had kept me from studying the Ph.D. in linguistics two years ago (the program opens once every two years). I applied for the program this year in January and I am starting to study this August, although the classes will be online due to the covid pandemic. I am really excited about studying again, I had given up on this dream two years ago. It really took me a while to get out of this relationship and be the person I used to be, but my friends were really supportive to me. I am really thankful I have this opportunity and I feel like I have even more direction in my life than before. thank you again dr. Ramani, your videos have been really useful to me during the last year.

Wards End Bistro

1 week ago

We have since learnt my husband is from a Narcissistic family (the Scapegoat child). he was always made to feel like he was an under-achiever and was mocked and teased relentlessly if he ever had aspirations otherwise, etc, etc.....

Since we met, he left the family home we got married and have our own family. He has excelled and now has a successful business utilizing the dreams and ideas he had all those years ago (the ones that his family members said were ridiculous, wouldn't work and would ridicule him about). My husband being a kind and loving person, says it's down to me that he's managed to do all this. But I disagree. It's down to his hard work and strength of mind that has made this all happen and I am merely there to help him on the days when the self-doubt kicks in to tell him to not give up and keep going. I'm hugely proud of him and feel incredibly lucky to have him in my life.

Steph Sancia

1 week ago

God Bless You Dr Ramani ❤️ My story on the next video ❤️ I take strength from your words ❤️

alexxdaye1

1 week ago

Thank you! I gave up everything. Working on turning it around now.

Cheryl Muir

1 week ago (edited)

"You may have been gaslit so many times that you began to doubt if you were sane, let alone competent." Thank you for your work, Doctor Ramani.

Belinda Valnes

1 week ago

Music has been in my bones since I was born. I was a singer for a while but then became more into my piano. I head it many times for therapy and taught piano for years. It was such an inconvince for my spouce to listen to that I gave it up. My children bought me a new piano and I have recently started playing again. What peace it is giving me. The words of discouragement are not going to take away anymore of my desire to use my gifts. Thank you for the encouraging talks.

i am gamsiz

1 week ago

Grateful to be at a distance from my grandfather, pained to witness my grandmother endure. I feel helpless and defeated in exploring support for her, even attached to some responsibility and duty to discover a capacity to support her that does not seem to exist.

Jim Wright

1 week ago

Thank you Dr Ramani for this video, this narrative helps bring into focus of the covertness of destruction of my journey, the real destructive forces that no one sees, only I, ,that happen on a daily basis, . Decades and decades of rumination, of invalidation, the lies, the gaslighting, the shaming, the guilting, a little each and every day, lots of days just filled with it, and my desire to accept and be better and make the relationship improve, was truly a false belief for being possible, the pursuit of validation, that got to be the worse on the soul, seeking this from your intamite partner, and they know this vulnerability and refuse to offer any is destructive, they must be right with all their insults, their invalidating comments, no compassion, zero empathy, yet you follow your heart and a false belief, that if you changed, they will validate you and it will get better, but it gets worse, and then your just numb inside, no desire, no energy, no drive, yet remnants of the dreams and aspirations hang on, but have no energy to move forward. Then you believe even more that it is all your fault, you choose to stay , it’s my fault, but I’m stuck with false hope that it will improve, that’s my dream. Over three decades, I have thrown in the towel and given up on dreams and aspirations, all on acccount of constant insults, constant invalidation, telling me I will never be good enough to do this or that, from being a coach for my boys in baseball, pursuing my college degree, at least three times I started and finally said it’s to draining to listen to her, maybe she’s right, to being told you will never be a software engineer, to many other things I was always told I was a failure and would not have her support to pursue. You just get numb inside and wonder if you are really sane, you loose mental bandwidth and aspirations, along with withdrawal from the world, friends and family, after all she's is right, who would interact with a looser. I'm slowly shedding all these false beliefs, and accepting I am not responsible for her feelings, nor she of mine, and learning how to not take the bait, and let her be sad all alone. And be content on the days when her true beauty comes out to shine, because I can't give up that hope that we all are filled with potential of goodness, but there is a darkness in this world that steals the potential, but ever so often darkness takes a day off, but always returns!

Deirdre Rigby

1 week ago

Thank you Dr Ramani.

I have

This video resonated with me to such a degree that I thought I would share some of my story. Please respect my disclosure as I am a counsellor, but we to have a history and this is some of mine.

I am 56 still in this relationship since 16. I believe I was groomed or some such.

Tired, tired, tired, mentally, spiritually physically and psychologically. Gaslighted by my parents.... you made your bed lie in it. That’s what I have done.

had no idea, seriously no idea what all the mechanics of this stuff was....

In this time I got my bookkeeping certificate, thought there was something wrong with me, so went for counselling, found out that People talk to me and thought I needed to learn this skill...so got my diploma in counselling, found I was dyslexic.....learning anxiety of mine is pathological....now going into my 3rd year of bsc honours is psychology with counselling part time. I love what I do and want to learn more and move my career up a notch. I have always had to work. All this I have funded myself. I work with teenagers mainly, as I want them to be better adults.....and have like you want people to reach their potential to make the world a better place. The waste of potential to me is evil. I have worked with ex offenders and was apauled at the waste of potential. I believe there should be full time school counsellors in all senior schools. They also need to be paid a decent wage!

Someone said to me that I am a wounded healer.

I have been over the years persecuted for my faith, beliefs.... to name but a few

Someone said to me I am a very strong woman.

I had no idea seriously no idea with whom and what I got involved with. I did not know there were people in this world like this.

I am told I am not good enough... that voice.... from childhood.... used against me in adult.

I have been told that doing this degree, which is a dream of mind, to move on, is a waste of time and money, at my age and that is coming from every angle you can think of.

Been told that I need to get a proper job.

I have lost my sons as they don’t respect me. I could go on and on.

How have I survived and why have I not left, you ask?

I read all the comments and admire how people have coped and done. Gives me hope.

I am so grateful I have found your videos and have put into words what is going on with people like this.

Each of your videos resonates with me, some times I find them so very hard to watch.

Kara Effin' Michael Lain Thrace

1 week ago

All that you have said in this video is true. I'm finally uncovering my potential.

Margaret Ahern

1 week ago

It makes me angry too to see a person especially a young child's potential being destroyed by narcs..they really do destroy people & relationships which have so much potential. My sisters & brothers had so much potential as did i, as the scapegoat i can see this & try my best to reach my potential now but i fear they may never do the same & they suffer in so many ways & live in denial about what happened.

Danielle

1 week ago

I was raised by a father who made the house feel we had to walk on eggshells all the time. One minute he was so proud of how well I did something and the next, he was reading my diary out loud to the family. I would constantly second guess and doubt myself. Never understanding what any of us had really gone through (it was all I knew of a father at the time) I ended up in a relationship with someone very similar. My feels and emotions didn’t matter and most of the time I felt like I was invisible unless he wanted something. I was miserable and would tell him that but it didn’t matter. We ended up having a child together and now, 7 years later, we are in a much better place. We found faith in Jesus Christ and our true Father has been helping me heal all those old wounds and see what love really it. HE IS LOVE and the most amazing Dad I could have ever asked for. He was waiting for us all this time and now that I’ve found Him, my heart is so so grateful ❤️🕊🌈 praise the ALMIGHTY!

devign design

1 week ago

Thank you for your compassion 🙏❤️❤️

Silvia Makoni

1 week ago

Story ; I am an older sibling I stayed home to save my brother nd mother from my father , for 8yrs , only to be told I the only thing I'm good for is to be a doormat . It broke me.yes I have done all the above the worst part is was ruminating , I have wanted to trade force but the constant minimization was brutal , now I'm broke , nd my mother is expecting financial support. I have realised that in my life if I want to pursue my dream I have to cut all my biological family off and the worst part is I have lost so much of potential , nd this will have a lasting impact on my life .

Inmaculada Concepcion

1 week ago

W🤓W! When the student is ready, the teacher appears! To keep it short am near 60, two of the many things repeated over and over were no one will help you I own you/gave you life and can take it. And you are ugly, no one will ever want you. My mom was a model thus beauty was a big topic. Think I'm finally freeing mySelf of her voice buh sometimes wonder what can I offer now? BUT!!!! ♥️The idea of taking a hike to its Base, might be doable 🤗😍 🕊💎🌈✨Thank 🌷🌻🌹✨Much Love & blessings sent your way. 🙏🏽(Subscribed, am unemployed but soon as back on my feet will look you up for some sessions. Am deeply touched😌)

Ideal City Living - ICL, GTV

Saturday 18 July 2020

Narcissistic Personality Disorder 2

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