In my case the flying monkeys are strangers. They don’t know me. They only know what the Narc has told them.
2
julia912 d
julia912 d
2 days ago (edited)
This has been the story of my life. This has completely traumatized my life not being able to find loyal family or friends, narcissists in both groups have targeted me. After all, narcs felt familiar and familial for many years. Thank you so much for this video!
disappearing remedy
disappearing remedy
3 months ago (edited)
Very clarifying. Thank you. I was a flying monkey before I was aware of all this narcissistic stuff. Your help has really been enlightening.
5
Queana Ivory Music
Queana Ivory Music
3 months ago
It’s heartbreaking...
4
Ray Of Light /Rayo de Luz
Ray Of Light /Rayo de Luz
1 month ago (edited)
WOW, this video is so interesting! This has happened to me through work, through my siblings, and through my ex marriage. My ex psychopathic husband, turned all my kids into his flying monkeys.
3
Pray for Peace
Pray for Peace
2 months ago
Exactly. My Ex was telling everyone that I was suicidal. I had a big life insurance policy. Then he stole my registered gun. That's when I had to leave. I felt he was going to stage a suicide.
2
Msgoody 2shoes
Msgoody 2shoes
3 months ago (edited)
Tho, sometimes, the victim cant give their side of the story for years. Sometimes, they have to wait for proof to come forward before anything can be said. Esp. if the narcissist is powerful enough to have victim jailed on false charges or thrown into a mental hospital.
2
Jade O'Shaunessy
Jade O'Shaunessy
6 days ago
My outlaws feel this virus is a nothing burger
They try to invite themselves from another state,
Not wearing masks
it's crazy making behaviour
1
Mèlle Romarín
Mèlle Romarín
3 months ago
You make me feel less alone and stop doubting myself. Thank you so much, Dr. Ramani.
6
Nora Peace
Nora Peace
3 months ago
It’s nothing worse than having a therapist who doesn’t understand narcissism doesn’t want to use terminology to talk about these things. It’s so invalidating
3
Janko Belin
Janko Belin
3 months ago (edited)
Very comprehensive. I run in a couple of flying monkeys a few years ago and now I have been schooled for life.
2
Becky Alenazi
Becky Alenazi
2 months ago (edited)
Omg, i was the employee that was attacked by flying monkeys and the pack leader narc. Eventually was fired after filing a complaint. Karma came 1 year later when the narc and her 2 superiors were all fired. Snap!
2
msolivialuv1
msolivialuv1
3 months ago
This happened to me!!!
4
Jenny Sedgley
Jenny Sedgley
3 months ago
it happened to me in a work setting and was completely devastating. When I look back though, I can see the workplace dynamics that made it possible and should have got out when my gut was telling me to go.
5
Keith Heller
Keith Heller
3 months ago
I think the smear campaign in the community like I had done to me was started from me being scapegoated in the family. Believe me it's so hard to keep sanity because I didn't know who was in with the campaign. I moved away because I was the problem. I know now who's starting with something and with what I know about nartistic behavior I can deal with it keeping my sanity.
2
Holly Elisabeth
Holly Elisabeth
3 months ago (edited)
I've posted about my situation on some other videos, but there have been some new developments, even after I got out of my former job. There is so much in this video that is spot-on. Near the end of my last career, the extreme narcissist turned many people against me, attacking everything from my actual job skill to physical attributes. Many people whom I was formerly close to distanced themselves from me, and it was quite lonely.
I also found it interesting that Dr. Ramani used the word "mafia." This is quite literally the term I used in a meeting close to the end of my career, where I was again being unfairly blamed for a situation that the narcissist instigated. No one even refuted my use of the word "mafia," though at the time, who knows if they really knew why.
That leads me to the "new development" part, which is that I had long suspected that the narcissist had had an affair in order to gain the loyalty of a key VP, who was above her and our boss. She subsequently got away with just about everything. It always struck me as odd that she could act awfully and unprofessionally, and yet never get punished, and oftentimes, would shift the blame onto others (often myself). And the men above us would act like nervous puppy dogs around her. And don't get me started on the flirting I witnessed. But even after I hinted to a higher authority that there may be something up, I was continuously doubted, gaslighted...the works. Only after I was already out of that place...I get a message from someone still in the company, saying it's come out that the narcissist did indeed have an affair with the person I suspected. Guess it feels good to know that my gut was right, but it angers me that no one of importance believed me while I still had my job.
3
Argile Australia
Argile Australia
3 months ago
One day I would love to hear (and this is off topic) Dr Ramani's knowledge of what happens to battered children in adulthood.
2
Hair by Dina
Hair by Dina
3 months ago
Thank you so much for this Dr. Ramani!!! It's so validating. I unfortunately have had this experience in both a work environment and other significant relationships that have affected my life. I now understand that we attract what we know. I have done so much research on narcissistic abuse and have watched so many videos on this topic because - VALIDATION! WOW! It can be so isolating and scary. When "your people" defend the narcissist and turn on you within a strong family dynamic~by the gross manipulation~ nothing more hurtful than that. I really could go on and on. Not sure if this all makes sense?! But Please know This video is one of the most helpful for me. You described the different Dynamics so well. Thank you for all of your work~
2
Chris Thvedt
Chris Thvedt
2 months ago
Oh yeah. I've experienced this. Many times from the narcissist in my life. I learned that these "flying monkeys" weren't friends in the first place.
2
liliana76 Rives
liliana76 Rives
1 day ago
Cut ✂️ the narcissistic abusive manipulative off a long with his flying monkey 🐒 walk away quietly 😜 dont go back ....karma will catch them...I alone moved on with my life a lot happier peaceful my kids and home is safe 😌
Dana Fraser
Dana Fraser
3 months ago
When I run into people who are always trying to make themselves look good by making others look bad, it's a deal breaker for hiring for my business or any relationship whatsoever. Also I've noticed if I think that out loud in the presence of potential flying monkeys.. Hey this person seems to making himself look good at the expense of others. It plants a seed in them
3
Steve Martin
Steve Martin
11 hours ago (edited)
I would love to see research on correlations between Cluster B disorders and the more empathy-driven moralities of small communities (Dunbar's Number or less) ... or those in institutional contexts, typically larger populations with behavior norms enforced by tradition, law, or algorithms. I have a strong suspicion that the population size of the social context has a strong influence on the salience of dark triad personality types and population sustainability. There is so much in this conversation that sheds light on how group dynamics affects minorities (— living in Japan for 37 years now ... and the Old Boy's club is just as dysfunctional here as in the states ... the insistence that foreigners can not understand 'The Japanese Way' is just another form of gas lighting).
From another video ...
This is spot on. I wish I could have seen this decades ago ... because in the same way that former professor and California senator Hayakawa said 'If you want to understand politics, just look at child psychology' ... this perfectly describes the dilemma of the idealist trying to work in good faith and integrity, but is stuck in a toxic work place. This is a particularly good break-down as to why being a 'whistle blower' is particularly difficult. Yep. @ — the work place.
Moving to Japan 37 years ago, and still living here, I worked my way up to a tenured Associate Professor's position ... Jissen Women's College, Tokyo Japan ... but had no idea that a college, even in an authoritarian culture, could be every bit as self-destructive as a narcissistic family. I was the only tenured non-native Japanese professor, so I was useful for awhile. But during the course of about a dozen years, I never once saw my colleagues engage in a discussion about the purpose of the curriculum or the ideals of education.
At first, I took them for their word, that this was 'the Japanese way', and tried to be as helpful to them as I could. But the cognitive dissonance between what they claimed and what they did, was so huuuuge (paying homage to the orange-hulk POTUS), I finally confronted their justification of 'the Japanese way' as being antithetical and mutually exclusive to the ideals of a liberal arts education — empowering the marginalized and holding authority accountable. Of course, that was the worst thing I could have done. The English Communication Department in particular became a mere euphemism for 'The Department of Propaganda for Japanese Cultural Exceptionalism'.
I retreated into just being the best classroom facilitator I could be. But ironically, and in hindsight, predictably, the more popular my classes became among the students, the more of a threat I was seen to the narcissists and their claim to represent 'the Japanese Way' — because all of my students were Japanese.
Even though I had a graduate degree in education (though never finished my doctoral requirements) and had published and presented research in three countries, I was micro-managed to the point that I no longer had the right to choose my own textbooks, much less collaborate with students to make our own material. I would increasingly be required to first get permission to do volunteer work for the local city government or NPOs on my weekends. One even said that if it were up to him, I would not be allowed to even use English on my weekends without Departmental permission.
Rather than being praised for classroom success and community outreach activities, the responses from my peers (now superiors by dint of nationality) was of fear and contempt. I was disempowered and marginalized from any decision making processes in the institution, and even forbidden to see the rules I was compelled to obey. It was certainly not an educational community.
Hmm ... just found an 'interesting' wiki read on 'Collective Narcissism' ... as well as 'Flying Momkeys' .... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collective_narcissism
And just as interestingly ... Wikipedia does NOT have a Japanese language translation of either page ... as if the conceit of Japanese Cultural Exceptionalism is a real thing. This is particularly problematic in a culture where saving face is everything for MOST people, not just narcissists.
Even other Japanese were not exempt from the narcissistic dysfunctions. One had a graduate degree from Japan's highest ranked school, Tokyo University ... but that didn't stop her from trying to hang herself. One day while chatting in my office, she pulled down the scarf around her neck to show me the rope burn from an attempted suicide by hanging, and asked me if I believed in 'god'. Three months later, the Department chairman announced the official school line, that our former colleague had died in a 'car accident'.
I resigned from the school, in protest, shortly afterwards. That was six years ago. And here in the Tokyo, Yokohama, Kawasaki area ... one of the most densely populated places on the planet ... I have not been able to find sustainable work. That might say something about about the degree and connection between authoritarianism and narcissism in Japan Inc. — a nice place to visit. But I guess the U.S. is getting its own lesson in those dynamics now.
The more I understand about the morality of group dynamics and the history of our species, the less optimistic I am of sustainability. The economic collapse for the working class and the pandemic only seems to be underscoring what has always been the oxymoron of 'human intelligence'.
1
Sylvia Amodeo
Sylvia Amodeo
3 months ago (edited)
Gossip was high on the list.. I knew alot of information that i was not interested in, but, subject to hear whether i liked it or not.
2
King's Kid
King's Kid
2 days ago
This was happening to me in the workplace. The one reason it ceased was because of the lockdown and we no longer had to work in the office. This woman kept wanting to be friends. I wasn't interested in a friendship with her I felt eerie when she was around. She turned everybody in the office against me. Began stalking me smear campaign stealing my work trying to prevent me from meeting my quota. Everytime I reported her they brushed it off saying it was innocent or mistake some type of mishap. Even had dates and times of her stalking me and this went on for years finally took it to HR. She had manage to get everyone wrapped around her fingers including managers and supervisors. So someone gave her heads up that I reported her so she went to Director of the department and they vouched for her and Director saved her job although I had all types of documentation dates times print screen shots of her in my work. She was stalking me cyberly as well constantly trying to see what I'm working on and recruited for the most part everyone in the office. Everyone turned on me they thought she was nice person because she was always buying people things observing them to see their interest and pretend she interested too it was a living nightmare. It's like this woman is possed with me and NO ONE BELIEVES she's doing the things I said. She even begin to dress like me. It was CRAZY like something out of a psychopathic movie. Everyone in the workplace turn against me. She slandered my name people stopped talking to me like I had the plague. I have NEVER experience anything like it in my life. She even lied and told HR that she and I were FRIENDS after I clearly told HR that we were not and explained I had been telling this woman to leave me alone for years yet they still believe her that we were friends!!! It was CRAZY I have no doubt THIS woman is pure EVIL and made it her mission to try and destroy me and my reputation at the workplace
Benji Maiava
Benji Maiava
3 months ago
Hello Dr. Ramani, can you do a video on intrusive thoughts about the narc. I was granted a 10 year TRO on my husband a month ago. It's like I'm unable to control my thoughts about him. Good and bad. When will these thoughts diminish?
2
DeAnn Drake
DeAnn Drake
3 months ago
Oh my gosh! This is exactly the situation I lived! My boss was an emotionally abusive narcissist. He turned my coworkers against me with outrageous lies. The abusivo situation finally came to a head when he made threats to me ( in front of another person) and I hired a lawyer. I “ won” my case against him as the evidence ( witnesses, employment law, workplace bullying) incriminated him. I have gone no contact with him and his flying monkeys ( blocked cell numbers Social media, etc) and now live in another town. I actually fear his vindictiveness.
1
Yehuda H
Yehuda H
3 months ago
I’ve had my ex’s best friend (who was “my friend” during the relationship) threaten me to call police after I went into a loud fight with my ex that led to the breakup.
Marilyn Sowa
Marilyn Sowa
3 months ago
Thank you the term is perfect. Flying Monkeys are very common in a workplace as a Narc boss specifically hires them and it's definitely a devastating no win situation for a victim. Flying monkeys are always looking for that bigger bunch of bananas from the Boss. I've also seen Flying Monkeys used in personal relationships and it really sucks.
2
Erin No Narc KUNLANGETA PREDATOR Abuser bum allowed
Erin No Narc KUNLANGETA PREDATOR Abuser bum allowed
3 months ago (edited)
They’re GREEDY everything they do is to get MORE resources! SUPPLY! GREED! They’ll do ANYTHING to satisfy their greed!
2
ImAnINFJer
ImAnINFJer
3 months ago
Having an intuitive nature my entire life, I knew my younger sister was a manipulator. At the time I knew nothing about narcissism. Because I didn't fall for any of her bullsh#t, we were constantly fighting. If you fell for her charm you were her friend. If you did not, watch out! Our unemotional mother was no help and there was no father in the household. At present I have no contact with my sister. I am working on myself after living with these women and am finding peace.
1
Margaret Valentine
Margaret Valentine
1 week ago
Oh yes, I remember when a girl twice to 3 times my size, who had a mustache, practically, was beating me up in school. The principal called us into his office. He asked us both, why can’t you two just get along? I was thinking, “but SHE has a mustache!! That’s why!!” The Narcissist principle, didn’t want to be bothered.
My Retreat
My Retreat
3 months ago
Thank you so much for this. I’m in the midst of the smear campaign. My whole family are now flying monkeys for my mother and sister who are both narcissistic. They’re telling anyone who will listen how bad I am. How I’ve always been a problem. How could I possibly stop speaking to my parents after everything they’ve done for me... etc etc. My brother is threatening me. They are spying on me on social media. Everything you spoke about is happening to me right now. Not once have they considered the impact on me especially as I live alone and am in lockdown. Unbelievable. But I have not responded at all. Anyone thinks it’s ok to comment I just delete and block. I felt really emotional listening to this but hearing that it’s true and not just my imagination is what I need reminding about constantly. Thank you so much.
1
Susan Goldman
Susan Goldman
3 months ago
Best thing I ever did was block all my narcissist's phone calls and messages.
2
Jan M
Jan M
3 months ago
You just described my childhood. My sister had to have ALL of the attention (that I didn’t want anyway). She turned friends against me and played the complete victim.
2
Becky Wood
Becky Wood
3 months ago
This concept is terrifying!! I can see how in my late 20s, I would've been a flying monkey target. Now I can see how it would be easy to become a victim because I would be the one speaking up.
3
K N
K N
3 months ago
I've seen miracle at workplave were I was for a short time as intern.. At lunch it was obvious that there was talking aiming to make flying monkeys for one worker (someone new if heard right) . And then it happened. One older worker stopped them and told them knock it off because we are working as a team and everybody has hard times when coming to unfamiliar place to work. And then was only silence for some time.
It felt like I want to worship her and hope that someday could be as strong as her 🥰
1
Sylvia Amodeo
Sylvia Amodeo
3 months ago
All the words, so true. The best part is if you KNOW what they actually mean, we tend to laugh, or giggle. The truth is funniest!
2
autumn oranges
autumn oranges
3 months ago
After watching this I have realized that it reminded me of what happened to me almost 10years ago (victim) at a past work place...and I kept getting flashbacks of the events. Any tips on how to not let painful emotions overcome you?
3
Darryl Yusko
Darryl Yusko
2 months ago
Wow. Just found Dr. Ramani. I am a 4 year victim of Covert-smear campaign of my partners’ Monkeys! & now. Finally. I know I am NOT crazy...!
I’ve lost all my oldest friends! All my support systems, & then she knew when to pounce & protect her reputation from our failed-toxic relationship. Blaming everything on me! Evicted by police from our shared home because, I went from asking for a kiss to being broken up with. Of course I reacted badly! As she planned. Now homeless & still feeling all alone..... Help!
1
Condè Nasty
Condè Nasty
3 months ago
These videos have been so helpful and I escaped!!! I got out of a toxic work situation where my reality was constantly being questioned!!! Having this information is like having a big fat ace up your sleeve.
2
northofyou33
northofyou33
1 week ago
My mother isolated me from everyone else in my family. Is this why I enjoy being alone? I often wonder whether I am wired that way, or did my mother create that personality trait by isolating me?
1
In Sync with the Infinite Tundra
In Sync with the Infinite Tundra
3 months ago
Are u keeping track of the Johnny Depp/Amber Heard Saga?
5
Katherine L Boudreaux
Katherine L Boudreaux
1 month ago
How com N’s have the best opportunity to play THE “Better Hand,” in THEIR best interests?
Dreamchaser_481
Dreamchaser_481
3 months ago
Dr. Ramani~I LOVE you!!! I have been dealing with smear campaigns and flying monkeys for the past couple years now... today was especially challenging with some new information I received. This video was right on time to help me work through this!! Thank you for your invaluable insight!! ❤️
1
Terry Platt
Terry Platt
2 weeks ago
11:50 can this shift be considered a migration within the karpmans drama triangle? -me the amateur psychologist
Susan Mama
Susan Mama
1 week ago
How grateful I am that I trusted my instincts over the years .... sadly it's taken until now to know I was doing the best thing I could ... and now after watching your videos I understand why it has been so painful for me. To have a narcissistic sibling who is married to a narcissist and a parent carefully recruited as her/their flying monkey..... has taken its toll. Thank you 🙏🏻
Patricia Hensley
Patricia Hensley
2 months ago
I just realized my dad did this to me years ago when I went away to college. He literally turned my siblings and my grandmother against me. That was 17 years ago. My siblings and I are still trying to recover.
Norman Keele
Norman Keele
1 month ago
When I was with my ex, she started to cheat on me behind my back. Not with one person but two. She decided she wanted to be in a “poly” relationship. This woman showed out of know where and her name is Jennifer. Quickly Jennifer moved into my ex house while I was still with her and they claimed they was friends. The week after I went back to my ex house, gf at the time and found a note on the fridge stating “family” rules. I knew what was going on right away. Later that day she came to me and told me all about how she didn’t know my ex was in a relationship and she acted all sorry ect and told me I should move in and she was thinking about going back.. She also told me about the other guy, and I told her I already knew about him and told her what I knew about him, because I did a casenet lookup on him and found out he was in thousands of dollars in debt. I also knew my gf at the time was always broke. When she shouldn’t of been. Later that night he other guy is contacting me and going off to me because Jennifer went to him and told him everything I said about him and triangulated us against each other. Since then she has continually told me my ex didn’t want to talk to me, however my ex would talk to me without any issues every morning on her way to work. Letting me know how she was doing, how the kids was, and sometimes even complaining about the drama in the house cause of Jennifer. However my ex would never reply to any texts or phone calls when she was at home, and most of them while she was at work. Like she was afraid someone would see and read the texts.
Jennifer and my ex decided to move Jennifer son whos 21 at the time from one state to this state. Before doing that they both said they didn’t want him here because my ex had a little girl who was 10 and they didn’t want her to witness Jennifer son behavior. Hes Autistic, and out of control, yada yada are the words they kept saying. Qiuckly Jennifer got my ex to move to a town from where she was 30 min away. With the idea “its closer to work”. However the truth in my opinion was to get her to move away from people that constantly came and checked in on my ex. Her friends ect. Also because I feel she wanted to get my ex trapped into buying a house so my ex couldn’t leave her. They end up finding a place to rent however again it was a place that was out of budget for my ex to be on her own. So they decided that the needed to move Jennifer son down.. So they told him to help him with his meds.. So they got him to contact SSI and get money from them to help move to the state Im in. Knowing all a long they was going to move him in with them and not help him get his own place.. So they used most of his money the coned him into getting from SSi to pay the down payemtn first month rent ect. After that she keeps posting stuff on facebook about everything he did be it good or bad.. and she always referred to him as “My Autistic son” and never my son and if it was a good thing she bragged about how good of a mother she is and how he wouldn’t of accomplished his goals if it wasn’t for her helping him ect. She also posts these on an parents with autisim group on facebook, and people message her, and comment on her posts about how great shes doing ect, or show her attention on what ever it is. So she eats it up.. Jennifer was confronted by her son Elijah one day whos 22 now. And a “fight” pretty much all verbal started and he stated he was done being treated the way he is from her,. She moved him in also quickly started charing him 400 in rent, an other 100 to pay for food and house hold itmes. As well 2 dollars per direction o anywhere he wanted to go. So if he wanted to go to the store he got charged 4 dollars. Being autistic he didn’t really realize how he was being taken advantage of money wize, and THAT is why this next part is BIG.. So he stood up to his mom, according to him and some other eye witnesses (most of them being flying monkeys) said he never touched his mom, but she called the police, had him arrested. Kicked him out because she was the victim of physical abuse (never had any marks on her) and she needed him gone. It was a punishment to him and it would make her look bad if she kicked him out for any other reason. So I told him that he needed to get a lawyer and get the assault charge of his record. She found out about it, and she attacked me on facebook. Putting my full name, my age, where I work, and even what city im from saying that “she isn’t going to be an other one of my victims.” As well as saying that I “befriend mothers of single kids.”.. but the truth is her son 22. She isn’t single because she with my ex. My ex when I called her and asked her if she could please as Jennifer to remove the post. She said it was warranted because they had gotten into a verbal fight with Elijah and his gf over me saying he needed to get a lawyer. This is one of the many attacks Jennifer has done on me and others I know. She doing everything she can to isolate my ex from everyone, especially me. She has called about 20 other people on her facebook page a narcissist and has posted all sort of examples why they are but none of them make any sense. She has gone into peoples house and took pictures of inside their homes come home and post the pics all over her facebook page without their permissions. She also will always block the people shes about to post about from seeing her profile timeline. Shes the most extreme case you will ever meet. She also has several people helping her. She even has sent me messages saying how much better she is then me and how I never had a chance with my ex. How I was stupid because she out smarted me, and didn’t know my ex was using me. How I am a pawn. Even told me that they had like 10 other guys inline before me to be the 3rd in their poly relationship and how I am so far down the list id never be considered. Lol but I don’t want that type of relationship so wouldn’t of mattered if I was first. Its just crap stuff to say. Whats your take on this women?
1
Darius E. Bennett
Darius E. Bennett
2 months ago
I have been through this! OMGoodness!
2
Bonnie Mendenhall
Bonnie Mendenhall
3 months ago
Dr. Ramani, you are an awesome story teller... The wizard of Oz! Awesome Psychologist🙌🏾
2
DoctorRamani
Roman M.
Roman M.
3 months ago
It is no longer "fly my pretties! fly!"
This was too touched by the Mandela effect...
1
Queana Ivory Music
Queana Ivory Music
3 months ago
Yup... that’s how it goes... it’s so frustrating and disheartening. Because all of those actions are very damaging.
2
Liberty Me
Liberty Me
3 months ago
You nailed it, how they use gossip. Thank you.
4
Sally Bader
Sally Bader
6 days ago
Amazing. I wash I know all this few years ago before the narcissistic ( my ex and father)ues my 4 children as flying monkeys 😓😢
mnikaluza yuwaste
mnikaluza yuwaste
2 months ago
Thank you for understanding this and articulating it so well
2
Danielle Geihs
Danielle Geihs
1 week ago
what happens when a person will do anything to win, including trying to kill you and getting other people to severely impact your health: is that a narcissist?
Imooye Gabriel Ohiolebo
Imooye Gabriel Ohiolebo
1 week ago
I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls, i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, i decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( Cyberhackingsage@gmail ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location, WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( cyberhackingsage@gmail )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467...thank me later.
1
Christine Hoppel
Christine Hoppel
4 days ago
Absolutely! I was married to a narcissist for 13 years. It is nice to understand the "flying monkey" term; it helps me maintain my sanity when new encounters with narcissists and their respective flying monkeys arise! Thank you Dr. Ramani!
MaSter Lin
MaSter Lin
3 weeks ago
I was roommates with a narcissist for 2 years and I heard him try and smear my name to others very soon into the relationship. I wish that I had left sooner
lassunsnachSueden
lassunsnachSueden
2 months ago
When we broke up after three years he said to me “I have no problems with the new people in my life and not with the old friends. It’s the people in the middle, like you, who always cause problems.”
Queana Ivory Music
Queana Ivory Music
3 months ago
Thank you. Watching your videos have given me so much more insight... and empowerment. It feels good to know that all of this isn’t just my imagination.
3
William Allen
William Allen
3 weeks ago
The isolation I went through was the catalyst needed for me to find my "voice". To this day, I am grateful for the narcissist and their flying monkeys. My "relationship eyewear" is awesome and my songs are true.
Y& K
Y& K
3 months ago (edited)
Thanks you Dr Ramani
I'm in this Dorothy situation before. You 've save my life. And I believe there will be so many life saved by your contents.
1
Bri
Bri
1 month ago
please continue to speak on work place narcissists. this was so good. Thank you!
2
DoctorRamani
SUSAN COSGROVE
SUSAN COSGROVE
3 months ago
Yes, thank you. Very clarifying and I like the warning...dont become a flying monkey! 👍
2
Josee Noel
Josee Noel
3 months ago
You rock sugar! Thank you so much! This forwarded link to covert's mom's eunuch [had 1/2 cancer/alcohol ridden voice box's vocal (that would be 4)] flying monkey is a fab early Easter 🐣 Gift! Xoxo Now she's (an 81 yr old drinking disaster) only got gouv nurses helping her stay in her home until her dying drop! That I'd flown in for a visit to be told by "Them" that "I" wasn't up to "Their" standards was certainly one of life's cruelest moments! I said good job trying to keep me away, it worked! 😘
1
WorththeWar
WorththeWar
3 months ago
it'a amazing to me how good people can do such bidding:(
2
Giovanna Gold
Giovanna Gold
3 months ago (edited)
Thank you, learned a lot. I have a question, as raised from a N.M. , feel like I am an easy target, and developed the worst of anyone, like a flying monkey with no reason. Of course, she is a mother and she loves her children so much and equally, we know, no way! But, I wonder how does it work, how can I be that magnetic that wakes up so much hostility and invasion. You know what I mean? For free. Like, I am in an empty church, praying, with my eyes closed, someone arrives and try to take my seat. Hahahahah, true.
1
Shay Rollins
Shay Rollins
3 days ago
WoW! Dr. Ramani is so right on with her videos. I was raised in a narcissistic household. I am 46 years old and I am just learning to trust my own feelings and to do what is best for me. I have cut ties with almost all of my family. I am creating closer ties with family and friends that I trust. I didn't know that it was a term for someone who turns against you based on what another has said. People become 'flying monkeys' all too easy. I have learned not to try to defend myself with them. It's lonely at times and emotionally draining. But I have learned that when someone is a flying monkey on one issue they will become one on another issue. I believe that if someone has one good friend they are blessed.
Joanne Messier
Joanne Messier
3 months ago
Everything you have stated here I have experienced when divorcing my Narcissistic Husband. He even turned our 2 oldest children against me, most of our mutual friends and extended family. This hurt more than his betrayal.
1
Just Renee
Just Renee
1 month ago
Before I knew this person in my life had NPD they had this sign in their house. It said "don't make me get my flying monkeys." I found it funny as I was a child at the time. Now that sign has an entirely new meaning...
Lee Boriack
Lee Boriack
3 months ago
Great lecture, PLEASE LESS COMMERCIALS ITS REALLY DISTRACTING AND MINIMIZES YOUR MESSAGE.
2
Love Love
Love Love
1 week ago
OMG that makes such perfect sense! Now I know understand why certain things happened in a couple of my relationships in the past....
Pismo T Clam
Pismo T Clam
1 month ago
It's the Democrat version of a "Clevland Steamer", it involves Barry and Mike Soetero.
ruwald defortier
ruwald defortier
1 month ago
All the clips I've watched from your channel resonate with me so much, and processing and unpacking all of the 2 decades worth of narcissistic abuse I've had to endure feels so good and I know it's the right thing for me, and all this still hurts so badly, especially during this whole pandemic. I feel like I'm finally coming to terms with the fact my parents never really care about me and actively seek to sabotage me in getting help, growing as a person, and cutting ties. I absolutely fucking hate how I had to be born into such a vile home. The only reason I even still believe in god is because when I think of god I think of my father towering over me as a child striking a debilitating fear into my heart, unwarranted.
Darlena Russo
Darlena Russo
4 days ago
Thank you for clarifying the "flying monkeys". I have had that happen to me. Definitely felt betrayed. Only one came to me and apologized. Thank you for a great video.
Merlin The Blue
Merlin The Blue
1 month ago
I can't point out how valuable the efforts are that Doctor Ramani puts into educating us on this dramatically underrecognized subject.
1
Maggie Larson
Maggie Larson
3 days ago
Triangulation and flying monkeys... my family’s playbook!
Mike
Mike
3 months ago
They are outside with their noise campaigns again these narcs flying monkeys .
2
Barry L
Barry L
1 month ago
Dr.Ramani...You, my friend, are the best Therapist I have ever encountered! It's good to listen to someone who will tell you what you need to Hear and tell you something that will be a Stepping-Stone in your walk in life! I have people or relatives that have Gaslighting me and etc...I just want you know that you have Helped me so much with your Teachings and videos! You my friend, have definitely been a STEPPING-STONE in my Life! Your work here is a Godsend in itself! I pray that others will take this information and weave it into their own Lives and that they too take it and make it an instrument for Good and not Evil...Thank you & God Bless you, in your coming in & your going out! (B.L.)
Norma Gaunce
Norma Gaunce
3 months ago
Thank you. I know this is true. ❤
2
Madalina Ianus
Madalina Ianus
1 month ago
ooooohhhhh my goshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, story of my life .... I can't say who is the flying monkey, but, he is in my life for a long long long time, and what you are saying there is just describe my life!!!
Omma Means Mom
Omma Means Mom
1 week ago
I over heard the narc in my life smear campaigning against me as for the reason we have no money. I confronted him the next day. There was some rage and hostility and a huge side of gas-lighting. He said, "but it's true, everybody already knows, I'm just telling them the truth." After that he stonewalled me for about 5 days, including during the untimely yearly family camping trip. He did not say one word on the way home even to the kids-he stonewalled all of us. He even plugged his ears so he actually could not hear us joking playing innocently with the kids. Today I witnessed him baiting me. Threatening me he has to leave to another area for work and asking me how much money I will need to go across country to move in with my parents. I have been grey rocking him since yesterday since I learned what the term meant. I'm curious what comes next because I always end up empathizing and rationalizing and believing his baiting that I give in and express feelings and emotion.
Shannon Jones
Shannon Jones
3 months ago
Thank you Dr. Romani! I am incredibly thankful for your life changing and empowering information. I can only hope you know how helpful this is to us. Stay well.
Maree Brissenden
Maree Brissenden
1 month ago
This was a revelation to me wow very useful it brought up old pain but now I understand thank you 🙏❤️
Sarah Gant
Sarah Gant
3 months ago
Thank you very much for this video it confirms what im going through right now the narc is going to flying monkeys and telling them a completely different story to make me out the bad person and then coming back to me and being 2 faced
2
Miss Mia
Miss Mia
1 week ago (edited)
Yes, been through this with my stepdad and a bf
Liz W
Liz W
1 week ago
Thanks for this,
If we're smearing our narc then are we just the same? Truth is relative right, especially when we're assuming their intention.
If we're blaming them are we the same?
Are we even noticing we are blaming....."should-ing" all over the narc..... Feeling like we are the victim... Not self aware.... Also all narcissistic?
What's the difference? Have we been "turned"? Not sure how you or that. Haha
Just trying to get clarity. Not criticism. Thank you for your knowledge
Shungite
Shungite
1 week ago
I live in a building where someone was cooking meth. Nobody believed me because the police & fire station sent out a defamatory safety warning about me to local businesses in order to intimidate me into silence and cause me to look unreliable. I should have reached out to the ADL immediately.
victoria pierscinski
victoria pierscinski
3 months ago
Really excellent! Adding, often narcissist’s family members as they often don’t have friends. In coverts, victim usually has NO CLUE what is going on!
2
Pyra Barnes
Pyra Barnes
3 weeks ago (edited)
Ah ha. This is what was going on. (edited to add that I wish I had known even a fraction of this long ago. It's far too late to take this advice. So I say to anyone who is just now discovering this is what's going on to take this seriously. The long term effects are even harder to fix.)
Alexa Valentino
Alexa Valentino
3 months ago
Thank you. You have just described my situation. Lost relationship with my son, grandsons and extended family.
BELLE
BELLE
1 week ago
Omg this explains soooo much in my life Thank you thank you thank you
Miss Mia
Miss Mia
1 week ago
So many people I was friendly with dropped me like I was nothing after getting into a relationship and not one would tell me why. Makes me think they cannot tell me the why without telling on someone.
A lot of these people were incel/mgtow types so they were biased against women in the first place so guess I should not feel too bad but it did hurt me.
Goodwill Bunny
Goodwill Bunny
2 months ago
Dr. Ramani, you have the best eyes on YouTube! I am grateful to you for making these narcissist videos. They are very helpful to me. I have an adult child that acts like a narcissist. She is into blaming, rage, and character assasination. I was shocked by her lies. She was able to distance me from family friends. Again, thank you.
Wanda Smiles
Wanda Smiles
3 months ago
Love your chats as always. Saw some tee shirts at walmart. Having enjoyed listening to your chats I realise I enjoy the tee shirts. Sorry I wasnt listening. Busy doing. Nothing, my dream job is doing nothing, right or wrong I'm still right. Fun to wear around the nar.🤣
nono no
nono no
1 month ago
Thank you for this "glossary" series Dr. Ramini. This has happened to me in a physically abusive marriage. My spouse made me feel like I was mentally unstable for crying after being punched in the face. I didn't know what a flying monkey was at the time. I was convinced by them that it was my fault (for example, I was watching tv too loudly). They would even goad me to apologize for my part in the abuse and seek forgiveness from God.
He recorded me crying once, telling him that I no longer want to be hit. It was late at night, I was in my night dress and sobbing. He sent that video to various people (his flying monkeys), telling them that he could no longer take my emotional outbursts and that I need to seek professional help.
I did get help for my abuse and left the relationship. After a time of no-contact, he physically forced his way into the home one day and assaulted me one last time before I finally had the courage to phone the police in utter terror.
After that, the flying monkeys swooped in to tell me that I overreacted and should never call the police over a simple lovers' quarrel.
I'm glad I found your videos. I have stopped contact with some of the monkeys and have gray rocked others and things have gotten better. Therapy has been helping too.
Rachel Rivka Dvir
Rachel Rivka Dvir
1 month ago
I subscribed cause this is my way to pay u back for all the clarity and making me feel like I am normal and I am not "too sensitive" and not alone..
Thank you❤
Joy Kigen Rob
Joy Kigen Rob
3 weeks ago (edited)
This is one of the most invalidating, destabilising and isolating aspects of abuse.
Katrina Elstrom
Katrina Elstrom
3 weeks ago (edited)
This is EXACTLY what is happening to me right now. Nailed it on the head. Question is how do I get out of it?
Pip fugl
Pip fugl
2 months ago
Doctor Ramani, you are telling the story of my relationship to a very "nice and happy" man, whom everybody in the neighbourhood liked and a sort of looked up to. A narcissistic psykopath.
He was a very bad parent to his daughter - but he went on telling people how mean I was to his daughter and many other bad things about me - which I dont dare to imagine. It was all lies-very big lies. In fact it was the things you surely could tell about him and acuse him for. He died suffering from cancer and people smeared me all along.
It was people whom I had known for 15-20 years who now hated me. And I could not understand it - it was so devastating. Probably they still hate me. It ended in 2004. But it still hurts inside me.
But all these years I did not understand what was going on - I was not mean, but mother to his child. I was very sad. But some years after a person showed up and told me about what he had told people in this area of Denmark-which I hurried away from when he was dead. Did I say he was very violent and manipulating tome too. I am happy that he is gone. IDo I have to tell, that I also took care of him during his severe illness. People said it was only for inheriting money - though money had not crossed my mind. But he had made a testament in which I inherited a small sum of money - I think now, that it was just to keep up the picture of me in peoples eyes.
Greet Verboven
Greet Verboven
3 months ago
A Big thank you, dr. Ramani 👍❤️ You just described my life with the Narcissist.
1
Bold Broadcasting Channel
Bold Broadcasting Channel
3 months ago
This is a great idea for a series! Thanks Dr. R 👏🏿👍🏾✌🏿
1
Candace Blackburn
Candace Blackburn
5 days ago
I believe my daughter has not only been groomed all of her life (she’s 30), but I believe she’s now being recruited as a flying monkey. How do you deal with a child who is a groomed flying monkey.
Frances2020
Frances2020
1 month ago
I think this happened to me 9 years ago with a jealous coworker and I had no idea why I could never get that job back despite leaving on excellent terms . I was having to defend myself about lies to my ex- supervisor about things I never did . I didn’t know the term ... thank you Dr.Ramani .
hope46sf
hope46sf
3 months ago
Serious business!! Thank you!!
2
Giselle Buonomo Self-Development Coach
Giselle Buonomo Self-Development Coach
2 months ago (edited)
Thanks so much, Dr. Ramani! The movie Serpico explains this even further and self-awareness is the way to ensure that YOU will not become anyone's "flying monkey".
Sumgai
Sumgai
1 week ago
Oh, I had quite a few flying monkeys talking at me.
One of them stopped being one when I started to ask that she bear the consequences for her suggestions.
A few I cut contact with.
Some stopped because they could see that the person I cut contact with........his words (e.g. I worry about him so I did this. I care about him.) and actions (no money for education, no time spent with me) did not match up AT ALL.
Anyway, I'll just cut off any more flying monkeys for that failure as a person. They're almost as bad as that person, honestly.
Dianne Willem
Dianne Willem
2 months ago
I would love if you could do a session on Narc adult child. I over valued my oldest daughter and she turned into a monster
chou kawaii
chou kawaii
3 months ago
WOW! You have been able to make sense of what I had been telling my ex for years. Apparently I don’t explain things like a professional so I don’t know what I’m talking about. His mother was the controller and him and his siblings (and sibling’s partners) were all of her flying monkeys. They hated me because of the things she said about me and made me into the problem. But my ex also wanted to get away from his mother but didn’t want to accept her as anything but good. Well I’m sure he knew because she was the trigger of his drug abuse which took his life. If I had seen this video months ago I would’ve shown it to him, but who knows if it would’ve made a difference. We can’t make others do what we think will help them. He was her flying monkey for 33 years.
Analie C Fernandez
Analie C Fernandez
1 week ago
I am so thankful for all your insights about Narcissism, Dr. Ramani🙏❤ It helped me tremendously!
Susan T.
Susan T.
2 weeks ago
In my experience, the flying monkey's betrayal was 100 times more devastating than the narcissist's abuse. Thank you for this series!
MILLY SHONA
MILLY SHONA
3 weeks ago
I was surrounded by “Flying Monkeys” watching & observing me 24/7.. It took me years to finally discover how to deal with them. I’ld tell each Flying Monkey 🐒 something very different. This way the Narcissist would be constantly confused. It worked to my benefit.
Pamela Cedarcreek
Pamela Cedarcreek
1 month ago
I was Gas Lighted and Torched in to an action that removed me from the room. My new friend was visiting and was at that moment left alone for 20 minutes with the NARCISSIST. I see now that was the moment she went from a potential friend of mine , to A FLYING MONKEY of his, for later in the day she said to me, If you were more Grateful, the Marriage would not be so tense “. I’m MELTING!!!!!!
Margaret Valentine
Margaret Valentine
1 week ago
Please do a video:
Narcs that come to seminars, esp welllness or enlightenment seminars for the sole purpose of having fun with the open hearted people!!!! Oh yes this is a phenomenon. Please expose it in great detail.
Madalina Ianus
Madalina Ianus
1 month ago
i don't use gossip anymore and I am proud of this <3
Arthi .M.P
Arthi .M.P
2 months ago
My mom is a flying monkey. She's been with my ND for almost 20 yrs now.
Just B. Cause
Just B. Cause
3 months ago (edited)
Thank you for a very informative video on the tactics of narcissists and the dynamics of how they use others for their own gain. It sure helped me and I’m sure it helped anyone who hears it.
annmarie keim
annmarie keim
3 months ago
Thank you dr ramani! This video was excellent. My flying monkeys would always want to get me back in their lives after helping my narcissist relative abusr me. It was so traumatic to me that I no longer cared that they shared some history with me. Even if those memories were good, I chose to move on. I felt they thought they could keep things like were because of those memories but I refused. This is a blowback to the narcissist.I didn't want that kind of suffering so I got good at no contact and grey rock.
J MK
J MK
1 month ago
I experienced this at my last work place.
What bothers is- does this mean that the narcissist is smarter , more successful. more capable than me in living life? Am I the loser?
Erin No Narc KUNLANGETA PREDATOR Abuser bum allowed
Erin No Narc KUNLANGETA PREDATOR Abuser bum allowed
1 month ago
"Supposed" to be dear to you but don't behave THAT WAY!!!🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Whole New World : Danielle Marks
Whole New World : Danielle Marks
2 months ago
He called everyone his puppets.
1
Annabella Escobar
Annabella Escobar
3 months ago
This series has been really interesting and useful to me. I've played the part of the victim twice in the past among really close family relations and, as a result of this, my children were going to live the same thing from their sons and one daughter, but I intervened to make them realize reality. It was hard to make them understand what was going on, but, with the help of some therapy and of girlfriends who perceived it, finally none of us are part of their game at all. I was the one who was really hurt twice as a young adult, but decided to have therapy right away. Those are the reasons why I've grasped fully and quickly this concepts. Thanks so much Dr. Ramani!!!
Echoes in the Valley
Echoes in the Valley
1 month ago
Once she somehow had a blood nose took a picture of it and sent photos to everyone saying I punched her in the nose
1
lbfinebe
lbfinebe
3 months ago
Thank you for sharing! I can relate to the flying monkeys my mom did it to me and hired a mean and nasty narcissistic woman to help me learn to manage my money. This women destroyed my relationship with my siblings cousins and an aunt. My family was warned by more than five people that the woman was dangerous and abusive. When I tried to tell my elder brother what was going on and that she was mentally and verbally abusing me he didn’t care. They warned my mother too and she didn’t care. She got my brother to convince my best friend to keep this woman and my best friend said no way and try to explain why. My brother wasn’t interested what she had to say. So since my family gave power to this evil woman and my mom paid this woman all up front that was why they didn’t care to get rid of her. I stuck to my guns cuz my mom was paying rent cuz my narcissistic husband took and ruined my inheritance leaving me to have to deal with my narcissistic abusive mom who triangulated all of my siblings on her side. I had therapy and it helped but you really put all of your videos into perspective!! I don’t have much to do with my siblings cuz of my mom and this lady. Even before I knew you I refused to let them get to me. This woman (a tyrant told me if I didn’t keep using her I’d have to leave apartment) I didn’t care if I had to live in the street at that point! I told this woman to go to hell! And she lied to my mom and told her I said burn in hell which I never said but my mom didn’t believe me! End of story I won cuz I wasn’t going to use her and my friend went to my mom and saw the text threats this woman sent me and my mom refused to look at the mentally damaging text so my friend said to my mom how could you let a woman talk to your daughter this way. What she is doing is unethical and know that I’m going to report her. That is why I had the courage to fight my mom and her. All it took is one strong friend to stick up for me. I found out at the end why my mom didn’t want to let her go it. Was because they didn’t check. Her back ground and they paid her in full up front. See it shows me that money is more important than mental and health and even abuse. I’m an empath and I would never say the things that were awful to my three kids. I love them more than my self. All the rest of my siblings only care about themselves. I’m the black sheep. So thank you for sharing your tools to help me shield myself better against them. My father was also a narcissist. So you said that was called double dungeon. My real father passed away in 1996 and my stepfather who was used and was her patsy died in 20007. So my mother had her friends the flying monkeys do her biding and her house keeper also was gas lit and did her bidding as well. So now you know my story and why it is so essential that I watch these videos. You have given me back my power. Ps one last thing her mother was also like that too. And my grandmother did it to me. She would say awful mean and hurtful things and get away with it. Now my grandmother is gone and I feel emancipated!!!
Love Pink
Love Pink
3 months ago (edited)
Great video l've noticed a lot of flying 🐒 are envious by nature themselves.. The world of Gossip, craziness feeds their own lack thereof ...To little to late when they realize their own demise sad..
D L
D L
3 months ago
Relationships are so complicated😂
1
My Mom
My Mom
1 week ago
Such important info, very clear. Thank you!
Lauren Bell
Lauren Bell
3 months ago
❤️ this video! Best one ☝️ about flying monkeys out there.
1
martycrow
martycrow
3 months ago (edited)
I wrote something a while back about how it feels....[sorry about odd spacing...not me!]...and yes it is about how Flying Monkeys fall under the Narc's spell....
Crown of Souls
There is a foe among us,
Its slimy poison creeps,
It too wears a crown,
Not one of thorns, though
It is worn, without mockery,
A Crown of Souls,
Pierced and collected, to adorn,
The greater glory,
of The Originator,
Derived from silence demanded
From The Voice,
Who wrote the gospel,
in these parts,
Whose words prevail,
and carried far,
in whispers and the unsaid,
Among the people
in this Babylon,
Who believe not in evil,
from one who steals
the Light,
in that brightness,
these strange words they hear,
half-known words,
jumbled,
misunderstood,
in dreamlike draw
them close,
close them,
to the stream,
in a dream
to the flames,
fed on fat,
cat,
mat,
sat,
pat,
another soul’s pyre,
to witness,
the glory,
the lights,
their face,
in joy,
and fear,
for they,
are still alive.
1
ANDRES Catella
ANDRES Catella
6 days ago
THANK YOU SO MUCH DOCTOR RAMANI, I HAVE BPD AND BOTH MY PARENTS AND SISTER COINCIDE SO MUCH WITH NARCISSISTIC DISORDER... I LIVE IN ARGENTINA WITH NO MEDICAL COVERAGE AND NO THERAPY FOR MORE THAN 10 YEARS, I'M FINALLY TRACING BACK HOW I ENDED UP THIS DAMAGED AND HELPS ME IN MY VERY SLOW RECOVERY (I DID SOME DBT 20 YEARS AGO). I ALREADY WATCHED ALOT OF YOUR CLIPS. I KNOW YOU'RE NOT MY THERAPIST BUT IT FEELS A LITTLE SO. I WISH YOU THE BEST. PEACE LOVE LIGHT.
L Gal
L Gal
1 month ago
Use your record app on your phone people, it helped me (can’t say if I won or not 😉) with my lawsuit against wrongful termination. Catch them in their lies before they can turn it on you 👍🏻!
Renee Amundson
Renee Amundson
3 months ago
Thank- you Dr. Ramani....I’ve learned so much from you.
1
Richard Walker
Richard Walker
3 months ago
Another great lesson! Thank you.
1
Sheila Best
Sheila Best
3 months ago
Thank you, Dr Ramani, you explained in very clear terms exactly what happened in my own personal life. The abusive narcissist, flying monkeys and smear campaign. On a previous video you stated that narcissists/flying monkeys operate in the dark that’s so true, they’re very covert in the actions until the results are revealed. What’s unsettling to me is the silence of the ‘good’ people or the ones who are not narcissistic/flying monkey but fully aware of what’s going on and do or say nothing to help the victim.
martycrow
martycrow
3 months ago
Thank you @DoctorRamani for this little-understood concept. I wonder if in an age of moral ambiguity and a rise in both narcissists and wannabe-narcissists, Flying Monkeys are happy to perform for the peanuts they get. Though they also derive a lot of buzz from sharing the gossip - it replaces genuine and positive reasons for connecting with someone else.
Charles Laleau
Charles Laleau
2 months ago
can you do a video of how to heal and heal with the Narcissists smear campaign?
2
Eliana Boer
Eliana Boer
1 month ago
From day one. The day before I decided to go against him. Two times the price.
abhishree pandey
abhishree pandey
4 weeks ago
M thankful to u each day fr sharing ur beautiful knowledge and doing this grt work
Anita Clarke
Anita Clarke
1 month ago
Thank you so much Love !
DoctorRamani
Roberto Biagio Randazzo
Roberto Biagio Randazzo
6 days ago (edited)
I have lived what Dr. Ramani describes and I can testify first hand - cause of sorrowful and hard experiences I lived - that's all true 100%.
Ja Ich
Ja Ich
5 days ago
I have a narc coworker who is very, very funny and uses gossip for his jokes, and everyone laughs.
He also uses the technic of sharing little "dirty" secrets about people to encourage you to do the same and than says that you are badmouthing people.
julia912 d
julia912 d
3 weeks ago
This is the BEST description of how narcissists use flying monkeys that I've ever heard. THANK YOU FOR POSTING THIS.
miss twinkle
1 month ago
I have been a victim but how do you defeat them when you are alone? I ignored them completely to the extent no contact but the managed to cause alot of harm
itisistacy TarotReader
itisistacy TarotReader
17 hours ago (edited)
Oh hell look out for flying monkeys! Yep little things that will go out of their way to screw things up!
The Perfect Autumn
The Perfect Autumn
1 week ago
Spot on within my narcissistic family. Younger narc brother re-recruited our narc father into a disagreement that was strictly between he and myself.
This latest incident confirmed my belief that this brother had been the family "mole", doing this type of two-face interacting with me for years, as he has been consistently woking to erode me downwards for decades.
Bryan’s BPD Journey
Bryan’s BPD Journey
2 months ago
I tried speaking out about my narc doctor ex abusing his power to get to me, they then victim blamed me for the way I responded to the abuse.
Some Random Lady
Some Random Lady
3 months ago (edited)
We've gone very gray rock with some family, especially lately. This situation involves a narcissistic couple who, depending on the situation, pinch hit as each other's flying monkeys. One is a covert martyr type with borderline/histrionic traits, and the other is a malignant hybrid of covert and overt with a nice dose of sociopathy tossed in for good measure. They have other flying monkeys they employ from time to time. No thanks! We tried to move across the world to get away, but COVID-19 reared its ugly head and everything has been put on hold.
1
Chinju Joseph
Chinju Joseph
1 month ago
Amazing,thanks..currently my parents are the narcs and sister the flying monkey
J.S. Wolfe
J.S. Wolfe
3 months ago
Excellent video, thank you. I have had the misfortune of being subjected to flying monkeys more than once and it was detrimental in a lot of ways. However, now, I don't care who the person is to me previously, if I observe a consistent pattern of cowardice, lack of integrity, and passive-aggressive behavior, I cut them off because no one can be safe within a circle of spinless people, to begin with, let alone encountering a narc with this type of unsupportive network on an easy day. My one tip to anyone is to ensure a solid support network. We live in a world infested with narcs, and even without that, you deserve to live with high standards.
wolfgangk1
wolfgangk1
3 months ago
Beautifully comprehensive!!!!
1
Echoes in the Valley
Echoes in the Valley
1 month ago
She got involved with a tenant telling doing God knows what he stopped paying rent started causing problems
She dumps the fm when she s done with them
Tai Baschieri
Tai Baschieri
3 months ago (edited)
I like the Satan comment. It is that dark at times..! Thanks to the puppet master, I have been ostracized by my children who, for these past four years, won't deign to cross my threshold...though I've stood by and been there in every way possible for them! The puppet master is the one who has taken them in as "lodgers" ..the in-law/outlaw! I was even threatened with violence in front of the puppet master who simply pretended to see and hear nothing..."Oh, leaving so soon? Well, goodbye!" smile smile smile...huh!
garagedancer
1 month ago
Flying monkeys, "friends" and coworkers.
thingsTheater
thingsTheater
2 months ago
They also say about the narcissist, “she’s been through a lot” and “she’s always been there for you—why throw that away now?” It makes you seem like the bad guy.
Tai Baschieri
Tai Baschieri
1 month ago
Please explain how to regain respect and stop the devaluation from flying monkey adult children Dr Ramani? 🙏🏼
DoubleAir andDrinkingWater
DoubleAir andDrinkingWater
6 days ago
As scapegoats, we need reminders to not fall into the narcissist’s trap of being flying monkeys too.
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